1993 April I was sitting with my children on the mat in front room. The front door was opened ajar. We were so quiet no talking and no movement oraf a little finger too, We stick to one another as if we were glued with Fevicol.
What we were doing in that mid summer noon ? We were peeping through the slightly opened door into the small pomegranate tree leaves and flowers. A very small sparrow like bird round and sharp is on the little twigs there flipping its feathery wings quickly over a little red pomegranate flower.. and drinking the nectar from it with its long beak. Its honey bird.. wow, in those days of 'no tv days' its a rare natural phenomenon to be witnessed to our hearts contentment.
"This little bird was so keen in its studious work, "I exclaimed to my children after the little one flew away.
What does it mean? These little ones asked me. I tried to explain them how industrious is this little bird in collecting the nectar from the flowers, the work God has given to it.
I gave a little pep talk on how much we should work which is entrusted to us, keenly and honestly. The work given to them is studying. I ended the talk promising them if they listen to me to study English and Telugu and Maths of the next class they were about to go after the summer, I would take them to Vizag and I would allow them to see wonderful things by climbing the little hillocks near grandma's house.
They were so happy with this pep talk and they started to study the text books and prepare for the next class in this month.
May 4th was the day we planned to be with my mother, as that day last year my dear dad left us for the Heavenly Abode.
On that day we sisters were sitting in the hall of the second floor and talking about some sorrowful events of the last year.
At this juncture John came and asked me 'Mom you told us we can climb the hill nearby if we did our studies at home. shall I go now? He was in hurry to get my permission. I nodded my tearful head.. without giving much thought to his demand.
Usually children used to ask our permission to go out and play, and I used to give number instructions of fair play and pray for them and entrust them to the hands of God and send them out.
But that day I did not do any of those things.
suddenly my sister shrieked with shrilled voice. " Leelakka where these children are.." she was in shocked face looking through the window. I rushed beside her and saw John was on the top of the hill and Paul was futher beyond his reach. all other children were climbing one by one after john, there we saw Joshi, princy and shiney too.. only Happy was not with them. She as usual in a room with a book to read in her hand.
I too was shocked and yelled at Happy, ' Go Happy, call your brother to come home at once" Thus saying desperately I climbed up on the terrace where the view was more clearer than through the window. So grasping the urgency of the situation, Happy ran to the foot of the hill , and shouted "John John, come down." I too was clapping from the terrace and making signs to him to come down at once.
I saw him turned 90 degrees and was trying to climb down now, and at one moment he jerked a little back to look at Paul , and the next minute I saw him uncontrollably running down the hill .. and I saw a great fall and the dust raising into the air.. and he was not visible to me any more as there were houses hiding the hill. Happy was crying aloud, Mom John is not visible, do not know where is he"
I ran down the steps of three floors at once ran into the valley shouting aloud, "Jesus, Jesus save my child" my voice echoed the valley.. every one was coming out to see the calamity.
When I reached the place every one was shouting, ' the boy fall in the ditch, he is uncounsious"
/somebody reached me and told me the boy was in the ditch of the house foundations, which were dug freshly and where in they put thorny bushes to cover. They also informed me that that boy is uncounscious in the great pit ... I was shouting aloud, the same, Jesus, jesus help my child, save my child. Could not run any more, I was squated on the ground and not able to get up. Somebody brought John, on the arms, he was listless, uncounsious, with blood on his shirt which was oozing from his temple... I called him John, but no response,
My two brothers-in-law were there and picked the boy, and i got on a scooter having john on my shoulder rushed to a local clinic.
I did not know what was going on. The doctor tried to revive john but he would not. In between he was giving cool drink and it was vomited into a big pool of water.
The doctor said, vomiting is not a good sign, and he could not do any thing now, and we could take him to home and put him under24 hours observation if he would revive it was well and good otherwise we were supposed to take him to the KGH.
Meanwhile a nurse who was a relative called me on phone, and said like this." sister, a person who is uncounscious after the fall and vomiting is not a good sign, In fact its dangerous situation. There might be inner injuries in the head, which might not be visible now, but it would be fatal so take him to the KGH immediatly. I know a boy who was hit by a car, there were no bruises outside, so the doctor just gave first aid and sent him, home, but later that night the boy died due to inner bleeding in the brain. As a senior Staff Nurse I warn you , take John to KGH . Being unconscious and vomiting is fatal."
I do not know what made me to sit with my son stubbornly beside him, the whole night.. praying and flowing the tears unceasingly.
I was praying beside him .
suddenly he tried to open his eyes at mid night. His eyelids were stick to one another and the eye was swollen in horrible manner.
It was mid night, I sat beside him praying in low voice, He recogized me and said, ' Mom, God gave me a promise that "I when I walk my steps will not be hamperedl when I run I will not stumble" Then why I fall in the pit, the ditch from the hill?-God promised me , then why?"
My mother heart was tore into peices and it was bleeding, what answer I can give to him? With tears I answered him, like this:
"I do not know John, I will ask God and answer you."
He again retreated back into unconscious mind, no more talk , he closed his eyes. The swollen eye could not be open, and there was the blood on it and on his shirt still.
Tears rolling down, with deep sighs I ran into another secluded room where I closed the doors and prostrated on the floor , wailing and weeping in His presence.
As it was the middle of the night I could not disturb others in the house who were sleeping. My deep sighs burning in my bosom and I was about to tear into pieces.
(That was the promise he got when he was 7 years old, now he is 10 years, I remember the day he got the promise. I will write about that promise before I continue to write what answer I gave to him , the answer God gave me to give him )
" Mom , Mom." I can hear his voice right from the gate of the compound wall. I was in the kitchen, I see the excitement in his voice. As I was cooking dinner, I could not leave the stove so I answered him back, 'Yes , common, I am in the kitchen., what's the matter?'
He is already in the kitchen both his arms around my knees, shouting with joy, " Mom my teacher told me we will have picnic on Saturday , "
I was astonished. And able to understand his enthusiasm.. because we were keeping the Sabbath in toto in letter, We have many Dos and Donts for the Sabbath, that is Sunday for us. So No picnics on Sunday was one of the Don'ts. In John's previous classes we never sent him to any picnic because all those picnics were arranged on Sunday. So he was disappointed whenever there was picnic in his class. But this time it is on Saturday, so naturally he was fully excited over it.
But I have had my own doubts and fears for these picnics, I knew how naughty was John, he would not keep quiet in one place, he runs fast, jumps fast, climbs fast and shows all his muscle and bone strength where it was not needed too.
So I was afraid to send him with any one , leave alone the picnic , fearing he will fall and hit himself, he will climb and fall on the ground,, he will run and get hurt or wounded... With these fears, whenver there was a picnic on sunday, I was in fact relieved not to send him due to the reason it fall on Sunday.
But now its on Saturday, I cannot say no.
But I do not know why I said, so , What made me to tell this little boy to seek the will of Gcod for the Picnic.
So I said," Ok johnny, its on Saturday, so you can go, but I am too afraid of your safety, I am scared to send you with any one fearing you will jump and fell or run and fell or climb and break your bones. So I tell you now, go into the other room and see what Jesus will tell you about this picnic, If He says He will take care of you then I will send, so you go and pray whether He would to tell you to go to picnic or not"
I think I said it playfully, even though I had that fear lurking in my heart .
But this time its my turn to be astonished to see John taking my word literally, Went into the other room and sought for a Bible and knelt down and started to pray,
I peeped into that room , seeing my son knelt and pray, I came back to the kitchen without disturbing.
Next thing I remember is he again in the kitchen with an open English Bible in his hand and a finger on a line in the Bible, It was "When you walk your step will not be hampered; and if you run you will not stumble"
Proverb 4 :12
I was wordless, the verse from the Holy Bible is there assuring him and me about his safety. My boy was only a kindergarten school boy. he cannot read english leave alone Bible. How he got this word of promise and why he brought this verse to me evading all my fears to say yes to his pleading to go to the picnic.
I have no other reason to tell him not go to picnic, the first hurdle Sabbath was nullified and the second reason of my fear for his stablity is ruled out, so I had no other go but to say Yes, you can go to picnic."
Now after 3 years of that experience and safety of his life, he had fallen into a pit, a ditch, and bruised hopelessly, and he is unconscious, and in between the recoveries, he lifted his swollen eyelid forcefully looking into my eyes asked Why he had fallen, whereas the Lord promised him that he would not stumble, and his steps would not hampered.. how can God say 'no' to his 'yes' promise.
I was crushed in soul seeing my son groaning in pain, and now on the top of it, he reminds me and asking me why God could not keep His promise to him
As a mother what answer can I give.
See children all ways have that freedom and accessibility to the mother more than the father, because it is the mother who feeds them sitting very near to them, it is the mother who corrects them observing them in close quarters, it is the mother whol caution them on many a tasks how to carry on them. So its easy for them to ask any question to their mother then and there without tarrying in time.
This is one of such timings, because he knew that any tough question can be answered by mother, she would answer all Bible questions for them, with this assurance he asked me ' MOM, why my feet hampered, why my step were slipped away, why I had fallen into the PIT?'
I have no answer , I knew that the promise was so real for him I was the witness when his tender hands lifted that old King James Version English heavy Bible to the kitchen and asked me to read the verse for him as he was led to claim that verse as his promise from the Lord.
Thus the question he asked me in between the conscious and unconsipuous mind, pushed me into the other room with a heavy heart of tears and prayer.
"Mom, God has given me a promise that my steps will not be hampered and my feet will not be stumbled. But why I fall into the PIT?"( John fall in a deep PIT which was dug deeply like a grave for the foundation of construction of a house -- and they put lot of thorny bushes in it . I do not know the reason for keeping so many thorny dried bushes there, but those thorns bruised John severely." ) So he wanted to know why he fall in that PIT.
I have no answer, I do not know what to tell him. So honestly I accepted that " Kanna, I do not know... I am really ignore of this answer. But I will ask the Lord and let you know."
It look like that he was contended with the answer, and trusted me that I would get the answer for him I dared not to leave his bedside, because the doctor warned me the danger of that night, but I need to go our and pray and ask God about the question my son asked. So I went out into the other room closed the doors to pray.
Once again I prostrated on the floor at the feet of my Lord, just as I am , I poured out my being in His presence and with supplications I queried Him, "Lord, my son is asking me about the promise you had given to him that 'his feet shall not stumble and his steps would not hampered" He asked me why this promise is gone with the wind? He asked me why his feet stumbled why his steps hampered, why he fall into that PIT, oh Lord , Oh Lord how come you forgot your promise to him, now he is asking me about that, Lord what answer should I give to him? What answer shall I give to him for his question why he fall into the PIT? Father I have no answer of mine, you tell me Lord what answer should I give my son."
Thus I prayed and I was led to open the Bible and see the verses in Psalms 107:13-15 & 19-20 " And they cried to the Lord in their trouble and He saved them from their distress; and He brought them out from darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains; Let them give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and for His wonderful deeds for men. 19 verse, and they cried to the Lord in their trouble and He saved them from their distress; He sent forth His word and healed them He rescued them from the PIT (grave )
I was reading the Telugu Bible where it is written the exact word John used for the PIT , in Telugu it is GUNTA Why I fall in that GUNTA
( PIT)
I was bewitched by the verse,
" And they cried to the Lord in their trouble and He saved them from their distress; and they cried to the Lord in their trouble"
Yes I cried to the Lord, I cried out His name in that valley loudly echoes of my cry were heard by everyone in that little place in between the hills, I asked the Lord to help us, save my son in His name... yes I cried to the Lord in my trouble,
" He sent forth His word and healed them"
Yes His word will heal my son, I read the psalms 51 and Isaih 53 to him at his bed side, surely my Lord will heal him with His word.
"He rescued them from the PIT (grave )"
Oh Yes He rescued him from the PIT>.. Then at this juncture I heard a voice still and small in my back of the brain, like this.
" PIT, do you remember that Joseph was in the PIT thrown by his brothers, he too cried from the PIT for help ?"
"Yes Lord he too fall in the PIT and he too cried aloud for help,"
"Yes , Didn't I give so many promises to him also about his future, Did I reveal all that is for him for the future in his dreams?"
"Yes Lord you promised him that he would save his brothers and parents and that they would prostrate in front of him."
" But what happened in the PIT< when he was in the PIT he too must had thought that I forgot my promises to him, but NO ... I did not forget the promise I gave him, I not only saved him from the PIT but I the Lord fulfilled all the promises I gave to him. Yes all my promises are Yea when I say Yea and 2 Corinthians 1:20 ( All the promises of God are Yea and in Him amen unto the glory of God by us.)
Therefore frantically I flipped through the pages of the Bible to the book of Genesis where the account of Joseph was written
Genesis.37:24 And they took him and cast him into a PIT and the PIT was empty. There was no water in it.
Here in this verse it was written PIT only not the grave ... wonderful, my swollen eyes were beaming with lights of joy.
My heart was at peace, the peace that was given by Him, "My Peace I give to thee, not the peace the world gives to you but my Peace I give to you ." John 14:27 Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you, I do not giveto you as the world gives"
This promise was fulfilled exactly at that moment.
so the I went and sat at the bed and praying silently in my heart, praising God for His peace.
so the next I did was, the minute he opened his eyes I was ready to give him the answer from the Lord.
I told him , he was so very happy and rejoiced along with me.
He slept peacefully till 11am , when he got up, my mother prepared Rasam ( pepper water) and I was giving the food to him . I was feeding him with my hand, he sat on a stool and eating, then with one eye he was staring at the calendar on the opposite wall and said, " Mom, you know my promise is behind this page . " That was the month of May, so I briskly got up and flipped the page back to see what promise he got for the month of April, there it was written like this ," ( this calendar was Lef calendar which all of us had the same calendar in our homes.)
Psalms 61:2 " Lead me to the rock higher than I" I could not control my broad grin then and there but I joked saying " Well , boy it may be your promise to ask God to take you higher rock than you are but You have to ask also when you get come down from such hillock"
Later I asked him why he climbed the hillock , he told me that he wanted to see what is there on the other side of the hill and that he wanted to pitch a flag on the top of the hill.... wow I was astonished at this adventurous spirit without any precautions of course...or without any training or skill to do that. which caused me great pain, and made him to escape a great accident by His grace.
