Couples in 19th century , These couple had a norm which was binding them to the responsibilities and decorum of the society.
The man shifted from Agriculture sector to Industrial sector. Moved from villages to the cities. Education of women was a debate in those days. I was in 6th class in 1962 and we had a debate under the big bunyan tree in Lady Yampthil High School in Machilipatnam. You know the topic was" Is it necessary for a woman to be eduated?" I remember also the artical written by Muppalla Ranganayakamma , the revolutionary writer on behalf of women rights, of those days.
The title of her article was "Is it necessary to breath air by women or not"--It was a sarcastic article about the education to women is necessary or not. She meant, 'Why we should discuss this issue of education is a must or not to women.. it look like asking is it necessary to breath air or not by women. She brought reformation in thinking of the society by her novels like Balipeetham, where a low caste educated had to marry a brahmin woman to fulfill her desire to die as a married woman on her death bed. But how he was treated once she recovered from the illness. This novel was taken as base novel for a Movie by the same name.
Those days were ridden with caste divisions, trampling women from their rights, but it was an age where women took lead to fight these norms of the socieity. In fact my own mother, was given in marriage to her relative at the age of 5 years and my dad was 9 years . It was child marriage. But my mom when she realized that her freedom to study was taken away from her , with the support of her widow mother joined a boarding school in Penugonda of E.G.Dt. and completed her Higher grade teacher training course, and started to work as a teacher in Eluru. BUT..my dad after he was trained as a Police Sub Inspector in Malabar and posted in Madras, felt its a shame to see his wife working as he was capable of leading the family.Those days men used to feel shame to eat the food earned by the wife or daughter. They used to take up full responsibility of feeding the family.
So my mother was asked to resign the job and join him in Madras. There in Egmore in 1952 I was born.
Whatever, the life of women was subjected to man's demands, My mother's favourite authoresses were Malathi Chandur and Muppalla Ranganayakamm, She live to the principles till now.. These and many other writers brought change in the minds of the people. Veeresalingam Panthulu, Raja Ram Mohan Roy, William Carrey Amy Carmel Pandita Rama bai and many others brought reformation in those days, especially among social norms which suppress women. like Dava dasi system, child marriages, widow remarriage, women education, Prohibition of Sati, Girl child infanticide etc.
This century was an awakening of women rights.
But the man was still regarded as the sole head of the family, and whole family was expected to obey him though now it turned up into Nuclear families.
The woman on one hand given freedom to be educated, but not allowed to express her own desires or tastes of color of her dress, or taste of the food. She needed to confirm to the likes and dislikes of man.
So the couples in the nuclear families away from the joint families and the supervision of the experienced men and women of the family started to experiment their own life in many ups and downs in life.
But it was really a strange thing how could they get on so well in case of family roles.
The nature teaches many, and the instinct plays good role to them who wanted to play good role as husband and wife in the family. Women was expected to take care of the education of her children, Kitchen was her private territory, where she felt its a shame to ask her husband to enter into it to help her. She was supposed to cook and serve in detail according to the tastes of man in time.Her role is to be played well in home , Sweet Home, I remember the novel I read by Malathi Chandur Home Sweet Home, where she depicted the role of woman how sweet it would be if she realize her role to please the family. You will be wondered if I tell you , in spite of many cook books and culinary art so much developed, I still feel her book "Vantalu and Pindi Vantalu" is the best book and it is with me still in my kitchen shelf to refer whenever I needed, There are so many culnary items, and I must say during all these years from 1979 till the date, i.e,2015 this book inspires me so so much, and recently I prepared mango jam from the recipe which is beyond the flaw.
Well, my point here is, the women in this century have had the freedom and no freedom in many ways,
But certainly more freedom than their predecessors,
(To be continued)
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Sunday, April 19, 2015
COUPLES IN INDIA (2)
The life of the married couple in India, or elsewhere in those ancient days was beyond to the comprehension of the present generation, As a professional Social Activist, I had studied these issues in close quarters, and interviewed many old couples to get the first hand information from them. Most of them are living in Old age Homes, and when I visited them the same pride in the mothers in law, the same tears in the daughter in law roles are very much the same. The life with all its ups and downs hasn't changed even an iota of the human nature. Here I am to bring this ancient life to you younger generation, most of you never had a chance to peep into the lives of these people, The foreign friends who were of Indian origin as well as those of them who were born and brought up in different countries could find this life as if it was of some aliens. hahah do not worry just go along with me in these lines, and have fun of it. with a good laughter or empathy for old sisters of us.
Couples In India, as we were reflecting over this issue, many thoughts were racing in my mind. The women in India were oppressed from the very beginning, we know the story of a gambler king and immoral life of he and his brothers who sold the queen as a pawn. She was the wife of 5 men, and besides she was coveted by the cousins of those men. They tried to molest her in public but no one came to her rescue except by god man by his magic of providing a cloth to cover her shame. This queen was none other than Dhroupadhi, the pathetice queen who was shared among the brothers as a harlot.
Even another queen was humiliated and abducted by another king and her husband though rescued her from the cruel king did not have the heart of accepting her so he sent her away into the woods while she was pregnant. Later he brought her but could take her as a queen so she died in self immolation by burning her self as she was not able to face the humilation and torture by the husband any more. She was none other than Sita the legend queen.
So was the lady Anasuya was tested of her purity by giving her to a man who had leprosy as wife, and expected her to show her purity till the end.
These were just bits of stories wherein their real plight was covered up and people made them dieties after they were ill treated and murdered them indirectly.
These stray cases tell us how the women were treated in those days, and even now in different form.
Once a woman lost her husband she was not supposed to wear good clothes, not supposed to eat hot food, or sleep in comfortable bed but on the floor, and she was not expected to be visible any where in the society or should not be seen smiling or happy at any cost.
In ancient India, she was killed by burning her on the buring pyre of her husband, and nevertheless even now she is burnt up psychologically evey minute of her life in the society by the looks or words which would stab her to her core.
The old couple are not welcomed to any of the house of the children, many a times. They are considered as a burden to go along with. They are looked down as illiterate comparing the knowledge the children gained now. The habits of the parents were looked upon with contempt, and thereby most of them live alone or in old age homes rather than the homes of the children.
In ancient India there were joint families, where the families of the brothers live under one roof and kitchen belongs to every one. The daughters in law used to take care of the kitchen, and as long as the kitchen is one the family is one. Usually the head of the family would be the older person of the family and the sons and dauhters in law used to give much respect to the elders in the family. But here again the daughter in law does not have a right to visit her own family , if at all she was asked to come to parent's home she need to take the permission of the male members of the family. we used to have a funny poem like story in our elementary school, The title goes like this" Kalvari Kodalu Kaliki Kaamaakshi"(= a daughter in law by name Kaamaakshi of a rich family) One day her brother came to take her to their parent's home, she says to her brother that she would go and ask permission of her husband and come , but when she asked permission he tells her that she need to take permission of his eldest brother, when she apporached her hiding her face in her viel , he says, she need to get permission from his mother first, then she went and ask her , she bluntly tells her she cannot give permission but she should get it from her husband, so she went and ask him permission. By that time the girl was utterly fearful and tired and worried and anxious to her core, at last after many a conditions the man of the house gives permission to her to go along with her brother to her maternal home.
The days were so that the girl cannot live independently nor she had any guts to do as she wished even with the permission of her husband.
I remember a funny story here, about the quarrels and fightings among the daughters in law.. in doing the chores of the house. In one house there were three daughters in law who were fighting allways about the work load. Each was complaining about the work load that she was bearing was too much than the other two. so the wise mother in law devided the work among the three saying, the first daughter in law should cook the food for every one by getting up early. The second one should serve the food to every one in the family. The third one should clean the plates and vessels.
Thus allotting the duties, the mother in law slept soundly that night. The next morning she got up and found her daughters in law were in their rooms fast asleep . wondering about the work pending, she went into the room of the first daughter in law and asked her abou ther duty. She told her that she pretty well got up in the middle of the night and cooked the meals and as she finished her work she is taking rest now. Wondering where the cooked vessels the woman went into the hall and summoned the three daughters in law and asked them what they did about their duties alloted. The first repeated the same answer she gave to her mother in law already, the second one said, " Ofcourse she cooked and went and I served in the plates, immediatly in the middle of the night itself and went to my room.The third one blurted out saying, "Oh yea, they both did their duties and went to sleep so I too cleaned the plates and vessels in the middle of the night itself and so I am taking rest now."
The mother in law could not close the jaw of hers which had fallen apart with astonishment.
Thus the joint families were becoming the coccoons of fear, fight and frustration, though outwardly did not show much strife.
There were often jealousy and quarrels amongst the ladies of the house and no peace to the men of the house. To make the house go smoothly the mother in law used to become a tyrant to brind order in the house.
Which ultimately brought many other problems, along with disrespect and division of the property into small innings. The widow in the joint fmaily was much more ill treated and she was abused physically and psychologically by her in laws in every way possible. The parents also would not allow her to come and stay with them as they fear to have a widow daughter would bring shame to the family and thus disrupting the weddings of her siblings. The Indian society do not prefer her children or her daughters to be taken as thier daughters in law. because she does not have a father to look after her needs or to give away lump sum money to the in laws.
When the joint family was destroyed due to urbanization , techonological development, employments in the cities, the village joint family which used to depend on agriculture distorted, and slowly the old type of living in one place , and sharing the food was vanished.
In its place Nuclear families emerged. I will write about these families and the couples in it in next episode. Meanwhile please write your comments down.
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
COUPLES IN INDIA
What I wrote here is a bird view of marital relationships in India.It is to give a deep understanding to my foreign friends and also the modern couples of India in this century.The life pattern led by those ancient couples was beyond imagination to you as you are living in such a stage where the economic, social and technological changes influenced the life of you couples drastically for good or for worse.
In yesteryear, the couples as they were getting old, as the responsibilities of the younger adult years passed away, and as their children could live their own, and visits now and then or ask them to visit them for a few days or a month, the couple used to stick to one another and bear everything in life the insults or praises with a mixed feelings of joy and sorrows.
There were ( I am speaking about the middle class Indian families one kind of couple wherein the wife was submissive from their very wedding day, and the husband used to be an authoritarian and took care of every thing in the family. In fact on first night of their wedding the bride is expected to bend and touch the feet of the husband to show her respect to him.
Working and earning was the right of man. She was constrained to her kitchen and to the maids and to the bed when every detail of the house work was fulfilled. She was not expected to play a role even in sexual relations, and she could not express her desires negatively or positively.
She was supposed to be hospitable and hard working from morning to evening and in return she will be given a gift or two such as a jasmines to her hair or a good saree to the pleasures of his eye, even there.
Unfaithfulness in the marital relations are common on the part of man which was considered as one of his credits. Whereas the feelings of jealousy were not the right of hers, but the husband can show it in the form of utter wrath by subjecting her to humiliation or reproach and rejection.
But the frivolities of husband were hidden under her long suffering stature and she was expected to be patient to his "extra"-curricular activities.
Man had his privacy and his own peers to go out. But the woman should keep her friendships within relatives, that too husband side.
She was expected to cook well and feed the family many a times she even used to forego many dainties which she prepared when the family was too fond of the food she prepared and extinguished it all. This she considered it as her 'credit' to do so.
Man used to be a the sole authoritarian to take up any decision in family right from the menu on the table( it means she must cook only those items which were prefered by him and in such a way which would be tasty to him alone. i.e,. if he want non veg everyday, she must prepare it everyday, if he wanted more salt or no salt in dishes she must prepare it in that way. otherwise the man may threw the meals plate outside the home, or he would even beat her for the way she did not taken care of his tastes.) and or choosing a groom to their children or wedding preparations of the children.
His power and authority was bestowed on him and he also felt the duty of taking care of his family was his and his alone.
The wife rarely express her opinion or show her likings or dislikings in any form.
The couple when they get old still used to maintain the same decorum till their last. The man expects the old woman, his wife to spread the bed sheet on his bed, take the plate from the table after he finished his meals. She never supposed to sit along with him to eat the food.
The previous ancient years were much more worse to her than these days. Like , even though she was pregnant she should not eat food without her husband first finishing his meals. Then only in his dirty plate she must eat her own food serving herself, alone.
In those days she was expected to get up much earlier than her husband, and touch his feet with her eye lids first and thank God by touching her sign of marriage to her eye lids again for she was a married woman and for a man was given in her life in spite she was a lesser human being.
By the time he got up she should prepare breakfast and bring a cup of hot coffee if he prefers it in his bed.
The woman all ways perfoms many prayers, rituals and visits many temples begging gods of different verieties to give long life to her husband.
She also beg those dieties to give her death before her husband. The society adores a woman who dies before her husband calling her as a diety Punnisthree and everybody will praise the dead body of her saying she is a blessed woman for she died even before her husband died. In case her husband died prior to her death, the society considers her as a bad omen, and boycott her to all the social gatherings. she should not attend to her children weddings too.
Previous years she was even expected to die on the pyre of her husband and burnt to death. If she die like that the society promised her that she would get the best place in heaven Moksha and she will be worshipped by the society as a diety after she is burnt to ashes along with the corpse of her husband.( even though he died because of drunkness or criminal activities) Actually the in laws will be gained by her death because the bride property need not be given back to her parents and the in laws could claim it as it was theirs as they consider her as their own daughter because she died for the sake of their own son.( to be continued)
The life of the married couple in India, or elsewhere in those ancient days was beyond to the comprehension of the present generation, As a professional Social Activist, I had studied these issues in close quarters, and interviewed many old couples to get the first hand information from them. Most of them are living in Old age Homes, and when I visited them the same pride in the mothers in law, the same tears in the daughter in law roles are very much the same. The life with all its ups and downs hasn't changed even an iota of the human nature. Here I am to bring this ancient life to you younger generation, most of you never had a chance to peep into the lives of these people, The foreign friends who were of Indian origin as well as those of them who were born and brought up in different countries could find this life as if it was of some aliens. hahah do not worry just go along with me in these lines, and have fun of it. with a good laughter or empathy for old sisters of us.
Couples In India, as we were reflecting over this issue, many thoughts were racing in my mind. The women in India were oppressed from the very beginning, we know the story of a gambler king and immoral life of he and his brothers who sold the queen as a pawn. She was the wife of 5 men, and besides she was coveted by the cousins of those men. They tried to molest her in public but no one came to her rescue except by god man by his magic of providing a cloth to cover her shame. This queen was none other than Dhroupadhi, the pathetice queen who was shared among the brothers as a harlot.
Even another queen was humiliated and abducted by another king and her husband though rescued her from the cruel king did not have the heart of accepting her so he sent her away into the woods while she was pregnant. Later he brought her but could take her as a queen so she died in self immolation by burning her self as she was not able to face the humilation and torture by the husband any more. She was none other than Sita the legend queen.
So was the lady Anasuya was tested of her purity by giving her to a man who had leprosy as wife, and expected her to show her purity till the end.
These were just bits of stories wherein their real plight was covered up and people made them dieties after they were ill treated and murdered them indirectly.
These stray cases tell us how the women were treated in those days, and even now in different form.
Once a woman lost her husband she was not supposed to wear good clothes, not supposed to eat hot food, or sleep in comfortable bed but on the floor, and she was not expected to be visible any where in the society or should not be seen smiling or happy at any cost.
In ancient India, she was killed by burning her on the buring pyre of her husband, and nevertheless even now she is burnt up psychologically evey minute of her life in the society by the looks or words which would stab her to her core.
The old couple are not welcomed to any of the house of the children, many a times. They are considered as a burden to go along with. They are looked down as illiterate comparing the knowledge the children gained now. The habits of the parents were looked upon with contempt, and thereby most of them live alone or in old age homes rather than the homes of the children.
In ancient India there were joint families, where the families of the brothers live under one roof and kitchen belongs to every one. The daughters in law used to take care of the kitchen, and as long as the kitchen is one the family is one. Usually the head of the family would be the older person of the family and the sons and dauhters in law used to give much respect to the elders in the family. But here again the daughter in law does not have a right to visit her own family , if at all she was asked to come to parent's home she need to take the permission of the male members of the family. we used to have a funny poem like story in our elementary school, The title goes like this" Kalvari Kodalu Kaliki Kaamaakshi"(= a daughter in law by name Kaamaakshi of a rich family) One day her brother came to take her to their parent's home, she says to her brother that she would go and ask permission of her husband and come , but when she asked permission he tells her that she need to take permission of his eldest brother, when she apporached her hiding her face in her viel , he says, she need to get permission from his mother first, then she went and ask her , she bluntly tells her she cannot give permission but she should get it from her husband, so she went and ask him permission. By that time the girl was utterly fearful and tired and worried and anxious to her core, at last after many a conditions the man of the house gives permission to her to go along with her brother to her maternal home.
The days were so that the girl cannot live independently nor she had any guts to do as she wished even with the permission of her husband.
I remember a funny story here, about the quarrels and fightings among the daughters in law.. in doing the chores of the house. In one house there were three daughters in law who were fighting allways about the work load. Each was complaining about the work load that she was bearing was too much than the other two. so the wise mother in law devided the work among the three saying, the first daughter in law should cook the food for every one by getting up early. The second one should serve the food to every one in the family. The third one should clean the plates and vessels.
Thus allotting the duties, the mother in law slept soundly that night. The next morning she got up and found her daughters in law were in their rooms fast asleep . wondering about the work pending, she went into the room of the first daughter in law and asked her abou ther duty. She told her that she pretty well got up in the middle of the night and cooked the meals and as she finished her work she is taking rest now. Wondering where the cooked vessels the woman went into the hall and summoned the three daughters in law and asked them what they did about their duties alloted. The first repeated the same answer she gave to her mother in law already, the second one said, " Ofcourse she cooked and went and I served in the plates, immediatly in the middle of the night itself and went to my room.The third one blurted out saying, "Oh yea, they both did their duties and went to sleep so I too cleaned the plates and vessels in the middle of the night itself and so I am taking rest now."
The mother in law could not close the jaw of hers which had fallen apart with astonishment.
Thus the joint families were becoming the coccoons of fear, fight and frustration, though outwardly did not show much strife.
There were often jealousy and quarrels amongst the ladies of the house and no peace to the men of the house. To make the house go smoothly the mother in law used to become a tyrant to brind order in the house.
Which ultimately brought many other problems, along with disrespect and division of the property into small innings. The widow in the joint fmaily was much more ill treated and she was abused physically and psychologically by her in laws in every way possible. The parents also would not allow her to come and stay with them as they fear to have a widow daughter would bring shame to the family and thus disrupting the weddings of her siblings. The Indian society do not prefer her children or her daughters to be taken as thier daughters in law. because she does not have a father to look after her needs or to give away lump sum money to the in laws.
When the joint family was destroyed due to urbanization , techonological development, employments in the cities, the village joint family which used to depend on agriculture distorted, and slowly the old type of living in one place , and sharing the food was vanished.
In its place Nuclear families emerged. I will write about these families and the couples in it in next episode. Meanwhile please write your comments down.
The life of the married couple in India, or elsewhere in those ancient days was beyond to the comprehension of the present generation, As a professional Social Activist, I had studied these issues in close quarters, and interviewed many old couples to get the first hand information from them. Most of them are living in Old age Homes, and when I visited them the same pride in the mothers in law, the same tears in the daughter in law roles are very much the same. The life with all its ups and downs hasn't changed even an iota of the human nature. Here I am to bring this ancient life to you younger generation, most of you never had a chance to peep into the lives of these people, The foreign friends who were of Indian origin as well as those of them who were born and brought up in different countries could find this life as if it was of some aliens. hahah do not worry just go along with me in these lines, and have fun of it. with a good laughter or empathy for old sisters of us.
Couples In India, as we were reflecting over this issue, many thoughts were racing in my mind. The women in India were oppressed from the very beginning, we know the story of a gambler king and immoral life of he and his brothers who sold the queen as a pawn. She was the wife of 5 men, and besides she was coveted by the cousins of those men. They tried to molest her in public but no one came to her rescue except by god man by his magic of providing a cloth to cover her shame. This queen was none other than Dhroupadhi, the pathetice queen who was shared among the brothers as a harlot.
Even another queen was humiliated and abducted by another king and her husband though rescued her from the cruel king did not have the heart of accepting her so he sent her away into the woods while she was pregnant. Later he brought her but could take her as a queen so she died in self immolation by burning her self as she was not able to face the humilation and torture by the husband any more. She was none other than Sita the legend queen.
So was the lady Anasuya was tested of her purity by giving her to a man who had leprosy as wife, and expected her to show her purity till the end.
These were just bits of stories wherein their real plight was covered up and people made them dieties after they were ill treated and murdered them indirectly.
These stray cases tell us how the women were treated in those days, and even now in different form.
Once a woman lost her husband she was not supposed to wear good clothes, not supposed to eat hot food, or sleep in comfortable bed but on the floor, and she was not expected to be visible any where in the society or should not be seen smiling or happy at any cost.
In ancient India, she was killed by burning her on the buring pyre of her husband, and nevertheless even now she is burnt up psychologically evey minute of her life in the society by the looks or words which would stab her to her core.
The old couple are not welcomed to any of the house of the children, many a times. They are considered as a burden to go along with. They are looked down as illiterate comparing the knowledge the children gained now. The habits of the parents were looked upon with contempt, and thereby most of them live alone or in old age homes rather than the homes of the children.
In ancient India there were joint families, where the families of the brothers live under one roof and kitchen belongs to every one. The daughters in law used to take care of the kitchen, and as long as the kitchen is one the family is one. Usually the head of the family would be the older person of the family and the sons and dauhters in law used to give much respect to the elders in the family. But here again the daughter in law does not have a right to visit her own family , if at all she was asked to come to parent's home she need to take the permission of the male members of the family. we used to have a funny poem like story in our elementary school, The title goes like this" Kalvari Kodalu Kaliki Kaamaakshi"(= a daughter in law by name Kaamaakshi of a rich family) One day her brother came to take her to their parent's home, she says to her brother that she would go and ask permission of her husband and come , but when she asked permission he tells her that she need to take permission of his eldest brother, when she apporached her hiding her face in her viel , he says, she need to get permission from his mother first, then she went and ask her , she bluntly tells her she cannot give permission but she should get it from her husband, so she went and ask him permission. By that time the girl was utterly fearful and tired and worried and anxious to her core, at last after many a conditions the man of the house gives permission to her to go along with her brother to her maternal home.
The days were so that the girl cannot live independently nor she had any guts to do as she wished even with the permission of her husband.
I remember a funny story here, about the quarrels and fightings among the daughters in law.. in doing the chores of the house. In one house there were three daughters in law who were fighting allways about the work load. Each was complaining about the work load that she was bearing was too much than the other two. so the wise mother in law devided the work among the three saying, the first daughter in law should cook the food for every one by getting up early. The second one should serve the food to every one in the family. The third one should clean the plates and vessels.
Thus allotting the duties, the mother in law slept soundly that night. The next morning she got up and found her daughters in law were in their rooms fast asleep . wondering about the work pending, she went into the room of the first daughter in law and asked her abou ther duty. She told her that she pretty well got up in the middle of the night and cooked the meals and as she finished her work she is taking rest now. Wondering where the cooked vessels the woman went into the hall and summoned the three daughters in law and asked them what they did about their duties alloted. The first repeated the same answer she gave to her mother in law already, the second one said, " Ofcourse she cooked and went and I served in the plates, immediatly in the middle of the night itself and went to my room.The third one blurted out saying, "Oh yea, they both did their duties and went to sleep so I too cleaned the plates and vessels in the middle of the night itself and so I am taking rest now."
The mother in law could not close the jaw of hers which had fallen apart with astonishment.
Thus the joint families were becoming the coccoons of fear, fight and frustration, though outwardly did not show much strife.
There were often jealousy and quarrels amongst the ladies of the house and no peace to the men of the house. To make the house go smoothly the mother in law used to become a tyrant to brind order in the house.
Which ultimately brought many other problems, along with disrespect and division of the property into small innings. The widow in the joint fmaily was much more ill treated and she was abused physically and psychologically by her in laws in every way possible. The parents also would not allow her to come and stay with them as they fear to have a widow daughter would bring shame to the family and thus disrupting the weddings of her siblings. The Indian society do not prefer her children or her daughters to be taken as thier daughters in law. because she does not have a father to look after her needs or to give away lump sum money to the in laws.
When the joint family was destroyed due to urbanization , techonological development, employments in the cities, the village joint family which used to depend on agriculture distorted, and slowly the old type of living in one place , and sharing the food was vanished.
In its place Nuclear families emerged. I will write about these families and the couples in it in next episode. Meanwhile please write your comments down.
In yesteryear, the couples as they were getting old, as the responsibilities of the younger adult years passed away, and as their children could live their own, and visits now and then or ask them to visit them for a few days or a month, the couple used to stick to one another and bear everything in life the insults or praises with a mixed feelings of joy and sorrows.
There were ( I am speaking about the middle class Indian families one kind of couple wherein the wife was submissive from their very wedding day, and the husband used to be an authoritarian and took care of every thing in the family. In fact on first night of their wedding the bride is expected to bend and touch the feet of the husband to show her respect to him.
Working and earning was the right of man. She was constrained to her kitchen and to the maids and to the bed when every detail of the house work was fulfilled. She was not expected to play a role even in sexual relations, and she could not express her desires negatively or positively.
She was supposed to be hospitable and hard working from morning to evening and in return she will be given a gift or two such as a jasmines to her hair or a good saree to the pleasures of his eye, even there.
Unfaithfulness in the marital relations are common on the part of man which was considered as one of his credits. Whereas the feelings of jealousy were not the right of hers, but the husband can show it in the form of utter wrath by subjecting her to humiliation or reproach and rejection.
But the frivolities of husband were hidden under her long suffering stature and she was expected to be patient to his "extra"-curricular activities.
Man had his privacy and his own peers to go out. But the woman should keep her friendships within relatives, that too husband side.
She was expected to cook well and feed the family many a times she even used to forego many dainties which she prepared when the family was too fond of the food she prepared and extinguished it all. This she considered it as her 'credit' to do so.
Man used to be a the sole authoritarian to take up any decision in family right from the menu on the table( it means she must cook only those items which were prefered by him and in such a way which would be tasty to him alone. i.e,. if he want non veg everyday, she must prepare it everyday, if he wanted more salt or no salt in dishes she must prepare it in that way. otherwise the man may threw the meals plate outside the home, or he would even beat her for the way she did not taken care of his tastes.) and or choosing a groom to their children or wedding preparations of the children.
His power and authority was bestowed on him and he also felt the duty of taking care of his family was his and his alone.
The wife rarely express her opinion or show her likings or dislikings in any form.
The couple when they get old still used to maintain the same decorum till their last. The man expects the old woman, his wife to spread the bed sheet on his bed, take the plate from the table after he finished his meals. She never supposed to sit along with him to eat the food.
The previous ancient years were much more worse to her than these days. Like , even though she was pregnant she should not eat food without her husband first finishing his meals. Then only in his dirty plate she must eat her own food serving herself, alone.
In those days she was expected to get up much earlier than her husband, and touch his feet with her eye lids first and thank God by touching her sign of marriage to her eye lids again for she was a married woman and for a man was given in her life in spite she was a lesser human being.
By the time he got up she should prepare breakfast and bring a cup of hot coffee if he prefers it in his bed.
The woman all ways perfoms many prayers, rituals and visits many temples begging gods of different verieties to give long life to her husband.
She also beg those dieties to give her death before her husband. The society adores a woman who dies before her husband calling her as a diety Punnisthree and everybody will praise the dead body of her saying she is a blessed woman for she died even before her husband died. In case her husband died prior to her death, the society considers her as a bad omen, and boycott her to all the social gatherings. she should not attend to her children weddings too.
Previous years she was even expected to die on the pyre of her husband and burnt to death. If she die like that the society promised her that she would get the best place in heaven Moksha and she will be worshipped by the society as a diety after she is burnt to ashes along with the corpse of her husband.( even though he died because of drunkness or criminal activities) Actually the in laws will be gained by her death because the bride property need not be given back to her parents and the in laws could claim it as it was theirs as they consider her as their own daughter because she died for the sake of their own son.( to be continued)
The life of the married couple in India, or elsewhere in those ancient days was beyond to the comprehension of the present generation, As a professional Social Activist, I had studied these issues in close quarters, and interviewed many old couples to get the first hand information from them. Most of them are living in Old age Homes, and when I visited them the same pride in the mothers in law, the same tears in the daughter in law roles are very much the same. The life with all its ups and downs hasn't changed even an iota of the human nature. Here I am to bring this ancient life to you younger generation, most of you never had a chance to peep into the lives of these people, The foreign friends who were of Indian origin as well as those of them who were born and brought up in different countries could find this life as if it was of some aliens. hahah do not worry just go along with me in these lines, and have fun of it. with a good laughter or empathy for old sisters of us.
Couples In India, as we were reflecting over this issue, many thoughts were racing in my mind. The women in India were oppressed from the very beginning, we know the story of a gambler king and immoral life of he and his brothers who sold the queen as a pawn. She was the wife of 5 men, and besides she was coveted by the cousins of those men. They tried to molest her in public but no one came to her rescue except by god man by his magic of providing a cloth to cover her shame. This queen was none other than Dhroupadhi, the pathetice queen who was shared among the brothers as a harlot.
Even another queen was humiliated and abducted by another king and her husband though rescued her from the cruel king did not have the heart of accepting her so he sent her away into the woods while she was pregnant. Later he brought her but could take her as a queen so she died in self immolation by burning her self as she was not able to face the humilation and torture by the husband any more. She was none other than Sita the legend queen.
So was the lady Anasuya was tested of her purity by giving her to a man who had leprosy as wife, and expected her to show her purity till the end.
These were just bits of stories wherein their real plight was covered up and people made them dieties after they were ill treated and murdered them indirectly.
These stray cases tell us how the women were treated in those days, and even now in different form.
Once a woman lost her husband she was not supposed to wear good clothes, not supposed to eat hot food, or sleep in comfortable bed but on the floor, and she was not expected to be visible any where in the society or should not be seen smiling or happy at any cost.
In ancient India, she was killed by burning her on the buring pyre of her husband, and nevertheless even now she is burnt up psychologically evey minute of her life in the society by the looks or words which would stab her to her core.
The old couple are not welcomed to any of the house of the children, many a times. They are considered as a burden to go along with. They are looked down as illiterate comparing the knowledge the children gained now. The habits of the parents were looked upon with contempt, and thereby most of them live alone or in old age homes rather than the homes of the children.
In ancient India there were joint families, where the families of the brothers live under one roof and kitchen belongs to every one. The daughters in law used to take care of the kitchen, and as long as the kitchen is one the family is one. Usually the head of the family would be the older person of the family and the sons and dauhters in law used to give much respect to the elders in the family. But here again the daughter in law does not have a right to visit her own family , if at all she was asked to come to parent's home she need to take the permission of the male members of the family. we used to have a funny poem like story in our elementary school, The title goes like this" Kalvari Kodalu Kaliki Kaamaakshi"(= a daughter in law by name Kaamaakshi of a rich family) One day her brother came to take her to their parent's home, she says to her brother that she would go and ask permission of her husband and come , but when she asked permission he tells her that she need to take permission of his eldest brother, when she apporached her hiding her face in her viel , he says, she need to get permission from his mother first, then she went and ask her , she bluntly tells her she cannot give permission but she should get it from her husband, so she went and ask him permission. By that time the girl was utterly fearful and tired and worried and anxious to her core, at last after many a conditions the man of the house gives permission to her to go along with her brother to her maternal home.
The days were so that the girl cannot live independently nor she had any guts to do as she wished even with the permission of her husband.
I remember a funny story here, about the quarrels and fightings among the daughters in law.. in doing the chores of the house. In one house there were three daughters in law who were fighting allways about the work load. Each was complaining about the work load that she was bearing was too much than the other two. so the wise mother in law devided the work among the three saying, the first daughter in law should cook the food for every one by getting up early. The second one should serve the food to every one in the family. The third one should clean the plates and vessels.
Thus allotting the duties, the mother in law slept soundly that night. The next morning she got up and found her daughters in law were in their rooms fast asleep . wondering about the work pending, she went into the room of the first daughter in law and asked her abou ther duty. She told her that she pretty well got up in the middle of the night and cooked the meals and as she finished her work she is taking rest now. Wondering where the cooked vessels the woman went into the hall and summoned the three daughters in law and asked them what they did about their duties alloted. The first repeated the same answer she gave to her mother in law already, the second one said, " Ofcourse she cooked and went and I served in the plates, immediatly in the middle of the night itself and went to my room.The third one blurted out saying, "Oh yea, they both did their duties and went to sleep so I too cleaned the plates and vessels in the middle of the night itself and so I am taking rest now."
The mother in law could not close the jaw of hers which had fallen apart with astonishment.
Thus the joint families were becoming the coccoons of fear, fight and frustration, though outwardly did not show much strife.
There were often jealousy and quarrels amongst the ladies of the house and no peace to the men of the house. To make the house go smoothly the mother in law used to become a tyrant to brind order in the house.
Which ultimately brought many other problems, along with disrespect and division of the property into small innings. The widow in the joint fmaily was much more ill treated and she was abused physically and psychologically by her in laws in every way possible. The parents also would not allow her to come and stay with them as they fear to have a widow daughter would bring shame to the family and thus disrupting the weddings of her siblings. The Indian society do not prefer her children or her daughters to be taken as thier daughters in law. because she does not have a father to look after her needs or to give away lump sum money to the in laws.
When the joint family was destroyed due to urbanization , techonological development, employments in the cities, the village joint family which used to depend on agriculture distorted, and slowly the old type of living in one place , and sharing the food was vanished.
In its place Nuclear families emerged. I will write about these families and the couples in it in next episode. Meanwhile please write your comments down.
The life of the married couple in India, or elsewhere in those ancient days was beyond to the comprehension of the present generation, As a professional Social Activist, I had studied these issues in close quarters, and interviewed many old couples to get the first hand information from them. Most of them are living in Old age Homes, and when I visited them the same pride in the mothers in law, the same tears in the daughter in law roles are very much the same. The life with all its ups and downs hasn't changed even an iota of the human nature. Here I am to bring this ancient life to you younger generation, most of you never had a chance to peep into the lives of these people, The foreign friends who were of Indian origin as well as those of them who were born and brought up in different countries could find this life as if it was of some aliens. hahah do not worry just go along with me in these lines, and have fun of it. with a good laughter or empathy for old sisters of us.
Couples In India, as we were reflecting over this issue, many thoughts were racing in my mind. The women in India were oppressed from the very beginning, we know the story of a gambler king and immoral life of he and his brothers who sold the queen as a pawn. She was the wife of 5 men, and besides she was coveted by the cousins of those men. They tried to molest her in public but no one came to her rescue except by god man by his magic of providing a cloth to cover her shame. This queen was none other than Dhroupadhi, the pathetice queen who was shared among the brothers as a harlot.
Even another queen was humiliated and abducted by another king and her husband though rescued her from the cruel king did not have the heart of accepting her so he sent her away into the woods while she was pregnant. Later he brought her but could take her as a queen so she died in self immolation by burning her self as she was not able to face the humilation and torture by the husband any more. She was none other than Sita the legend queen.
So was the lady Anasuya was tested of her purity by giving her to a man who had leprosy as wife, and expected her to show her purity till the end.
These were just bits of stories wherein their real plight was covered up and people made them dieties after they were ill treated and murdered them indirectly.
These stray cases tell us how the women were treated in those days, and even now in different form.
Once a woman lost her husband she was not supposed to wear good clothes, not supposed to eat hot food, or sleep in comfortable bed but on the floor, and she was not expected to be visible any where in the society or should not be seen smiling or happy at any cost.
In ancient India, she was killed by burning her on the buring pyre of her husband, and nevertheless even now she is burnt up psychologically evey minute of her life in the society by the looks or words which would stab her to her core.
The old couple are not welcomed to any of the house of the children, many a times. They are considered as a burden to go along with. They are looked down as illiterate comparing the knowledge the children gained now. The habits of the parents were looked upon with contempt, and thereby most of them live alone or in old age homes rather than the homes of the children.
In ancient India there were joint families, where the families of the brothers live under one roof and kitchen belongs to every one. The daughters in law used to take care of the kitchen, and as long as the kitchen is one the family is one. Usually the head of the family would be the older person of the family and the sons and dauhters in law used to give much respect to the elders in the family. But here again the daughter in law does not have a right to visit her own family , if at all she was asked to come to parent's home she need to take the permission of the male members of the family. we used to have a funny poem like story in our elementary school, The title goes like this" Kalvari Kodalu Kaliki Kaamaakshi"(= a daughter in law by name Kaamaakshi of a rich family) One day her brother came to take her to their parent's home, she says to her brother that she would go and ask permission of her husband and come , but when she asked permission he tells her that she need to take permission of his eldest brother, when she apporached her hiding her face in her viel , he says, she need to get permission from his mother first, then she went and ask her , she bluntly tells her she cannot give permission but she should get it from her husband, so she went and ask him permission. By that time the girl was utterly fearful and tired and worried and anxious to her core, at last after many a conditions the man of the house gives permission to her to go along with her brother to her maternal home.
The days were so that the girl cannot live independently nor she had any guts to do as she wished even with the permission of her husband.
I remember a funny story here, about the quarrels and fightings among the daughters in law.. in doing the chores of the house. In one house there were three daughters in law who were fighting allways about the work load. Each was complaining about the work load that she was bearing was too much than the other two. so the wise mother in law devided the work among the three saying, the first daughter in law should cook the food for every one by getting up early. The second one should serve the food to every one in the family. The third one should clean the plates and vessels.
Thus allotting the duties, the mother in law slept soundly that night. The next morning she got up and found her daughters in law were in their rooms fast asleep . wondering about the work pending, she went into the room of the first daughter in law and asked her abou ther duty. She told her that she pretty well got up in the middle of the night and cooked the meals and as she finished her work she is taking rest now. Wondering where the cooked vessels the woman went into the hall and summoned the three daughters in law and asked them what they did about their duties alloted. The first repeated the same answer she gave to her mother in law already, the second one said, " Ofcourse she cooked and went and I served in the plates, immediatly in the middle of the night itself and went to my room.The third one blurted out saying, "Oh yea, they both did their duties and went to sleep so I too cleaned the plates and vessels in the middle of the night itself and so I am taking rest now."
The mother in law could not close the jaw of hers which had fallen apart with astonishment.
Thus the joint families were becoming the coccoons of fear, fight and frustration, though outwardly did not show much strife.
There were often jealousy and quarrels amongst the ladies of the house and no peace to the men of the house. To make the house go smoothly the mother in law used to become a tyrant to brind order in the house.
Which ultimately brought many other problems, along with disrespect and division of the property into small innings. The widow in the joint fmaily was much more ill treated and she was abused physically and psychologically by her in laws in every way possible. The parents also would not allow her to come and stay with them as they fear to have a widow daughter would bring shame to the family and thus disrupting the weddings of her siblings. The Indian society do not prefer her children or her daughters to be taken as thier daughters in law. because she does not have a father to look after her needs or to give away lump sum money to the in laws.
When the joint family was destroyed due to urbanization , techonological development, employments in the cities, the village joint family which used to depend on agriculture distorted, and slowly the old type of living in one place , and sharing the food was vanished.
In its place Nuclear families emerged. I will write about these families and the couples in it in next episode. Meanwhile please write your comments down.
Saturday, April 11, 2015
May be God has a work for you in this place.....!!!
May be God has a work for you in this place....
Many a times we come to a point where we just wonder why we are placed in this place. Certainly when God's people are given certain cozy confined comfortable environment to enjoy and to relax and nothing to do much, particularly in such haven to live in.
But everything doesn't seem not so comfy outside your harem, your protected portals of Palace. And that news reached your ears as it did to queen Esther, what we you are going to do. The TV, the news papers, the internet is giving all that bad stuff happening to our very own parts of the body. But still are we not suffering with those limbs mutilated, eyes gauged out. heart pierced into pieces, body burnt up?
Just because we are in safe length of distance may be too far from Iran , Irac, Afghanistan, Pakistan, where our brethern are torched to death, persecuted and killed ?
Many of our friends do not have the habit of reading news paper or knowing the things that are happening around the world. They are enjoying their foolhardy, make shift life.
"For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from other place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?"
These are very strong words to think about. Remain silent at this time???? At this times of jeopardy? At this time of choas, riots, and oppression?
The response of queen Esther was appreciable. She reacted in such a way, equipping herself to put herself in the place of those who are going to be persecuted in the hands of the wicked. She put herself in a position of martyar. Even if I die , I die. was her slogan of her life.
The result of that prayer , the history of the nation was changed, the persecution stopped, the Jews were protected, and released. Are we not in those times once again?
Yes we are happy to be in safe place, but people are perishing, where there is no vision people perish. Do we have that vision of Mordacai and Esther? If only they did not pray what would happen .. yes certainly relief and deliverance would come to Jews from other quarters, but Esther name would not be in Bible, and she and her family would have erased from the history of the world. But it did not happen like that, because she gird up herself to fast and pray and do something taking risk of putting her very own life on stake.
Yes, the Jews have had many persecutions, no doubt about it, we say, its because they did not believe in Jesus or because they displeased God, and God punish them because He loves them, etc etc.
Let us see what Luke 13:1-5 says:
Pilate killed, murdered certain Galileans while they were sacrificing the goats, bulls and oxen in the temple; and he purposefully mixed that blood into the blood of sacrifices. People were thinking that they were killed because those were bad people. But Jesus was asking them a stright question, Do you think they died like that because they were bad? If you do not REPENT AND IF YOU DO NOT HAVE REBORN EXPERIENCE you too will be perished like that.
Oh my ... this is too much to hear, is it not? None but Jesus said this. He also reminded them about 18 people who were crushed under the tower which was fallen on them. The name of tower was Siloam. Not the WTO twin towers. Do not think they were worse sinners, or more guilty than of us. He warned them REPENT OR YOU WILL PERISH.
The message of Jesus Christ, the essence of the gospels, was about Repentance, Rebirth. Unless we have this experience we will be perished too.
The very first message of Jesus was recorded in Matthew, was 4:7 Repent the kingdom of God is near.
The very last message of Jesus was recorded in Luke24:47 REPENTANCE AND FORGIVENESS OF SINS should be proclaimed. was His commandment.
The very essence of His message was recorded in John 3: 3..Truly Truly I say unto you, unless one is REBORN AGAIN he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.
3:7 YOU MUST BE BORN AGAIN. do not be surprised for I am telling you this.
3:11 He is asking why you do not accept my testimony, telling you that you should be REPENT AND REBORN?
John the Baptist was telling us REPENT AND BE BAPTIZED... Repentace is all the most the first step before we take up baptism. Rebirth experience is needed even before the Baptism. John the Baptist of course did not spare the Pharisees when they came to take baptisim without Rebirth experience. He called them on their face 'you brood of vipers"
When I came to know of Christ first in my life I heard that One must repent and experience rebirth and get the assurance of forgiveness.
I wondered not understanding this word repent, especially in Telugu language the word was translated as TURN AROUND, or CHANGE OF MIND.
I could not perceive what does it mean, Change of mind..? What does it mean . Unless I change my mind, or turn around in my life, God will not forgive my sins? So I keenly noted down in my mind how the others were testifying their lives had been changed,, how they repented, how they set rights things with God and man. But still this question of Turn around was eating me up. I could not understand it like Nicodemus of the old times.
So when I learned that God speaks to us through the Bible I gird up myself to read the Bible. I thought the Old Testament was too much for me to understand it. So while I thought of reading New Testament with these questions about Repentance and Rebirth were in my mind. But the Holy Spirit led me to the last book of the New Testament.
I turned pages to the last book. There it was the book of Revelation, in Telugu it was translated as PRAKATANA rather the meaning is Proclamation.. Not knowing what i was reading, while the question about Repentance and Rebirth were pestering in my soul, I started to read chapter by chapter.
When I come to read the chapter 2, I found in verse 5-Consider how far you have fallen and REPENT. I stopped there, what , I am told to consider how far I have fallen, how much I grieved my God by my sinful ways, ... Consider... all my sins from my childhood are infront of me... with tears in eyes I proceeded..
Again I saw the verse 2:11 REPENT or otherwise, I will come soon to punish you... I was a bit taken back, so I understood this venture of repenting is not a cool game, I need to change my mind immediately, or God will punish me.. fear encompassed my eyes now.
Then my eyes stopped at 2:21 God is telling me that He is giving time to me to repent... Summer holidays..) so With an expectation of deliverance I proceeded further in my reading, still having the question in my mind " How to get Change of mind?
Then when I reached the chapter 3:3 Remember therefore what you have received, and heard hold it fast and repent. There I stopped longer period of time. God was telling me to remember how those people gave testimony of their lives, how they changed their mind, how they reconciled with their enemies, how they restituted what they took wrongly from others, how they set right with their friends all those lies they spoke and then How God lead them to repent, and in tears how they seek the forgiveness of God.. and later how they were assured that God forgave their sins and gave a promise of salvation. When I started to remember all this LIGHT was coming into my heart.
I further went in reading the Bible and I saw in 3:19 that God says, that He loves me and He disciplines and rebukes me to be earnest and repent.
This is indeed great verse for me. God is not going to punish me but because He loves me , He tells me to repent and set right things with God and man.
Wondering How specifically God speaks when we go to Him with a question, I started to read Mathew, after I finished Revelation. Now the word of God is like honey in the honeycomb, I am able to understand it unlike in previous times.
When I come to the verse 5:23-25 It says when you are praying and if you remember that you quarreled with some one , leave your prayer requests there and leave that place go and reconcile with them first and then come back to continue your prayer. I remembered how haughty I was , How I fought with the pride of my brought up in a Police Officers family, I humbled myself immediately, I left my Bible in that room I rushed to my foes and wept holding their hands asking them to forgive my proud behaviour, They were astonished and asked me why I am asking them like this, I told them unless I ask the pardon of them God will not pardon me. I told them I was reading Bible and Jesus told me so. They were Muslim family, thus my first witness started with Muslim botheren. They were astonished to see my CHANGED BEHAVIOUR and became my best friends later.
I with tears asked the forgiveness of my parents because I spoke so many lies, behaved quarrelsome and dishounered them so very much. I started to love my sisters who used to fight with me for nothing. They were the first souls I lead to the Lord by lovingly taking them to the House of God to listen to the word of God. I was telling all my relatives, aunties about the new life I found in Christ. I returned the novels I took from my friend Kamala going back to Kakinada from Vizag.
While I was seeking the Lord's forgiveness one fine morning while I was reading the Bible this verse emerged out and out into my eyes and stuck with me since then.
Colossians 2:13-15 it goes like this When I was dead in my sins, He wrote all those transgressions on paper, struck them and erase them and nailed them to the cross, and lift them out and forgave my sins by giving the eternal life.
What a wonderful promise, it lighted the weight of sin on my back, I rejoiced utter mostly, I cried in joy. I praised Him with all my soul. Since then my life changed all the old things stopped, old friends changed , old habits changed, instead new friends, new type of books, new habits emerged in my life. The word of God became afresh and I liked to spend hours together in His presence. God started to give me visions of my future and dreams of promises and instructions, till I realized His voice specifically in my all situations. I started to recognize His voice .. and thus He started to lead me.
Dear friends, whatever church you belong, the Lord in Revelations tells all the people in all the Churches that they need to REPENT and telling them as He told to Nicodemus that one should have the experience of Rebirth. Now i have shared the meaning of these two words.. you need to make an appointe with God. and seek HIM, in your life and go into the path of Narrow way, the end of it is Eternal life.
Remember the Satan came to the body of Moses to be claimed, just because he over reacted to the commandment of God, and because God forbidden him to enter into the promised land, the satan thought he could claim the body of Moses and would not allow him to be resurrected.. But Micheal was there to protect Moses body. If Moses could not escape the viles of the Evil one..at that one moment, who are you and me to escape after we die?
But I have this promise Colossians 2"13-15 I will tell the Devil , get away you Satan, My Lord forgave all my sins by lifting it out between Him and me.. He wrote all those sins on paper , about that list you devil pointing me out, of course, but he struck them off, and nailed them to the cross, and erased them with His precious blood, and throw them off from His presence and forgave me ... who you are , how dare you are to come to claim me.. I am the child of God you get away satan." That would be my answer... I challange my dear friends can say so ? Do you have assurance here on this earth that you are forgiven?/
If not REPENT. and have experince of REBIRTH now and now .. for this the time to repent and reconcile with God.
May be God has a work for you now... because you are able to read this blog of mine, you have work for your soul, Do what you need to do... God will bless you .
Many a times we come to a point where we just wonder why we are placed in this place. Certainly when God's people are given certain cozy confined comfortable environment to enjoy and to relax and nothing to do much, particularly in such haven to live in.
But everything doesn't seem not so comfy outside your harem, your protected portals of Palace. And that news reached your ears as it did to queen Esther, what we you are going to do. The TV, the news papers, the internet is giving all that bad stuff happening to our very own parts of the body. But still are we not suffering with those limbs mutilated, eyes gauged out. heart pierced into pieces, body burnt up?
Just because we are in safe length of distance may be too far from Iran , Irac, Afghanistan, Pakistan, where our brethern are torched to death, persecuted and killed ?
Many of our friends do not have the habit of reading news paper or knowing the things that are happening around the world. They are enjoying their foolhardy, make shift life.
"For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from other place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?"
These are very strong words to think about. Remain silent at this time???? At this times of jeopardy? At this time of choas, riots, and oppression?
The response of queen Esther was appreciable. She reacted in such a way, equipping herself to put herself in the place of those who are going to be persecuted in the hands of the wicked. She put herself in a position of martyar. Even if I die , I die. was her slogan of her life.
The result of that prayer , the history of the nation was changed, the persecution stopped, the Jews were protected, and released. Are we not in those times once again?
Yes we are happy to be in safe place, but people are perishing, where there is no vision people perish. Do we have that vision of Mordacai and Esther? If only they did not pray what would happen .. yes certainly relief and deliverance would come to Jews from other quarters, but Esther name would not be in Bible, and she and her family would have erased from the history of the world. But it did not happen like that, because she gird up herself to fast and pray and do something taking risk of putting her very own life on stake.
Yes, the Jews have had many persecutions, no doubt about it, we say, its because they did not believe in Jesus or because they displeased God, and God punish them because He loves them, etc etc.
Let us see what Luke 13:1-5 says:
Pilate killed, murdered certain Galileans while they were sacrificing the goats, bulls and oxen in the temple; and he purposefully mixed that blood into the blood of sacrifices. People were thinking that they were killed because those were bad people. But Jesus was asking them a stright question, Do you think they died like that because they were bad? If you do not REPENT AND IF YOU DO NOT HAVE REBORN EXPERIENCE you too will be perished like that.
Oh my ... this is too much to hear, is it not? None but Jesus said this. He also reminded them about 18 people who were crushed under the tower which was fallen on them. The name of tower was Siloam. Not the WTO twin towers. Do not think they were worse sinners, or more guilty than of us. He warned them REPENT OR YOU WILL PERISH.
The message of Jesus Christ, the essence of the gospels, was about Repentance, Rebirth. Unless we have this experience we will be perished too.
The very first message of Jesus was recorded in Matthew, was 4:7 Repent the kingdom of God is near.
The very last message of Jesus was recorded in Luke24:47 REPENTANCE AND FORGIVENESS OF SINS should be proclaimed. was His commandment.
The very essence of His message was recorded in John 3: 3..Truly Truly I say unto you, unless one is REBORN AGAIN he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.
3:7 YOU MUST BE BORN AGAIN. do not be surprised for I am telling you this.
3:11 He is asking why you do not accept my testimony, telling you that you should be REPENT AND REBORN?
John the Baptist was telling us REPENT AND BE BAPTIZED... Repentace is all the most the first step before we take up baptism. Rebirth experience is needed even before the Baptism. John the Baptist of course did not spare the Pharisees when they came to take baptisim without Rebirth experience. He called them on their face 'you brood of vipers"
When I came to know of Christ first in my life I heard that One must repent and experience rebirth and get the assurance of forgiveness.
I wondered not understanding this word repent, especially in Telugu language the word was translated as TURN AROUND, or CHANGE OF MIND.
I could not perceive what does it mean, Change of mind..? What does it mean . Unless I change my mind, or turn around in my life, God will not forgive my sins? So I keenly noted down in my mind how the others were testifying their lives had been changed,, how they repented, how they set rights things with God and man. But still this question of Turn around was eating me up. I could not understand it like Nicodemus of the old times.
So when I learned that God speaks to us through the Bible I gird up myself to read the Bible. I thought the Old Testament was too much for me to understand it. So while I thought of reading New Testament with these questions about Repentance and Rebirth were in my mind. But the Holy Spirit led me to the last book of the New Testament.
I turned pages to the last book. There it was the book of Revelation, in Telugu it was translated as PRAKATANA rather the meaning is Proclamation.. Not knowing what i was reading, while the question about Repentance and Rebirth were pestering in my soul, I started to read chapter by chapter.
When I come to read the chapter 2, I found in verse 5-Consider how far you have fallen and REPENT. I stopped there, what , I am told to consider how far I have fallen, how much I grieved my God by my sinful ways, ... Consider... all my sins from my childhood are infront of me... with tears in eyes I proceeded..
Again I saw the verse 2:11 REPENT or otherwise, I will come soon to punish you... I was a bit taken back, so I understood this venture of repenting is not a cool game, I need to change my mind immediately, or God will punish me.. fear encompassed my eyes now.
Then my eyes stopped at 2:21 God is telling me that He is giving time to me to repent... Summer holidays..) so With an expectation of deliverance I proceeded further in my reading, still having the question in my mind " How to get Change of mind?
Then when I reached the chapter 3:3 Remember therefore what you have received, and heard hold it fast and repent. There I stopped longer period of time. God was telling me to remember how those people gave testimony of their lives, how they changed their mind, how they reconciled with their enemies, how they restituted what they took wrongly from others, how they set right with their friends all those lies they spoke and then How God lead them to repent, and in tears how they seek the forgiveness of God.. and later how they were assured that God forgave their sins and gave a promise of salvation. When I started to remember all this LIGHT was coming into my heart.
I further went in reading the Bible and I saw in 3:19 that God says, that He loves me and He disciplines and rebukes me to be earnest and repent.
This is indeed great verse for me. God is not going to punish me but because He loves me , He tells me to repent and set right things with God and man.
Wondering How specifically God speaks when we go to Him with a question, I started to read Mathew, after I finished Revelation. Now the word of God is like honey in the honeycomb, I am able to understand it unlike in previous times.
When I come to the verse 5:23-25 It says when you are praying and if you remember that you quarreled with some one , leave your prayer requests there and leave that place go and reconcile with them first and then come back to continue your prayer. I remembered how haughty I was , How I fought with the pride of my brought up in a Police Officers family, I humbled myself immediately, I left my Bible in that room I rushed to my foes and wept holding their hands asking them to forgive my proud behaviour, They were astonished and asked me why I am asking them like this, I told them unless I ask the pardon of them God will not pardon me. I told them I was reading Bible and Jesus told me so. They were Muslim family, thus my first witness started with Muslim botheren. They were astonished to see my CHANGED BEHAVIOUR and became my best friends later.
I with tears asked the forgiveness of my parents because I spoke so many lies, behaved quarrelsome and dishounered them so very much. I started to love my sisters who used to fight with me for nothing. They were the first souls I lead to the Lord by lovingly taking them to the House of God to listen to the word of God. I was telling all my relatives, aunties about the new life I found in Christ. I returned the novels I took from my friend Kamala going back to Kakinada from Vizag.
While I was seeking the Lord's forgiveness one fine morning while I was reading the Bible this verse emerged out and out into my eyes and stuck with me since then.
Colossians 2:13-15 it goes like this When I was dead in my sins, He wrote all those transgressions on paper, struck them and erase them and nailed them to the cross, and lift them out and forgave my sins by giving the eternal life.
What a wonderful promise, it lighted the weight of sin on my back, I rejoiced utter mostly, I cried in joy. I praised Him with all my soul. Since then my life changed all the old things stopped, old friends changed , old habits changed, instead new friends, new type of books, new habits emerged in my life. The word of God became afresh and I liked to spend hours together in His presence. God started to give me visions of my future and dreams of promises and instructions, till I realized His voice specifically in my all situations. I started to recognize His voice .. and thus He started to lead me.
Dear friends, whatever church you belong, the Lord in Revelations tells all the people in all the Churches that they need to REPENT and telling them as He told to Nicodemus that one should have the experience of Rebirth. Now i have shared the meaning of these two words.. you need to make an appointe with God. and seek HIM, in your life and go into the path of Narrow way, the end of it is Eternal life.
Remember the Satan came to the body of Moses to be claimed, just because he over reacted to the commandment of God, and because God forbidden him to enter into the promised land, the satan thought he could claim the body of Moses and would not allow him to be resurrected.. But Micheal was there to protect Moses body. If Moses could not escape the viles of the Evil one..at that one moment, who are you and me to escape after we die?
But I have this promise Colossians 2"13-15 I will tell the Devil , get away you Satan, My Lord forgave all my sins by lifting it out between Him and me.. He wrote all those sins on paper , about that list you devil pointing me out, of course, but he struck them off, and nailed them to the cross, and erased them with His precious blood, and throw them off from His presence and forgave me ... who you are , how dare you are to come to claim me.. I am the child of God you get away satan." That would be my answer... I challange my dear friends can say so ? Do you have assurance here on this earth that you are forgiven?/
If not REPENT. and have experince of REBIRTH now and now .. for this the time to repent and reconcile with God.
May be God has a work for you now... because you are able to read this blog of mine, you have work for your soul, Do what you need to do... God will bless you .
Sunday, April 5, 2015
Peter, Peter Pumpkin Eater !!!
Peter, Peter Pumpkin Eater—
John 21:1,2,3 verses. “ I will go for
fishing”
“I am confused, frustrated down casted, no hope , no
future, remorseful—do not know what to do now- Jesus is no more -3 and half
years he was so busy, so busy not even had time to eat or sleep—thought life
serves very well, thought life has had some meaning after all, a purpose and a
goal to achieve, Now everything is finished, nothing to do, what to do now? Nothing
to do, nothing to plan.. wasn’t I so busy arranging meetings, bringing people
to Him, taking care of the mobs wwho were thronged all along ? Yes when He was here
there was so much work to do, every day was a new day, with new surprises, new
mercies, new challenges, new assignments to finish, when everything was done
looking into His glowing face of appreciation was Heaven on earth, the lonely
hours with Him were much awaited, to listen to Him and to eat with Him.. but
NOW……???
Just ONE DAY—everything is changed,
He was crucified and died—all is STOPPED at once. When Jesus was walking just a
few days back, why only last Sunday, everyone was praising, Halleluiahs, His
name is Saviour Hail to the King, Son of David, It was so real then, expected
great things to happen within this wonderful week, Thought He would manifest Himself as the
Redeemer, as The Saviour- yea, the meaning of indeed His name is SAVIOUR: But oh But what happened, He was crucified along
with two Highway robbers, and DIED. BURRIED. He was in the grave like every
one, He is just a man?
What happened to all His served Him,
miracles of 3 and half years? I was running after Him, walked close to Him, Life
looked like it had a purpose, a meaning to it after all. Before meeting Christ,
it was jolly go lucky life, hard work, tiring myself to the core, eating
drinking and sleeping just like any animal, But after that encounter with Him,
everything changed… My brother Andrew took me to Jesus telling me that he found
“Messiah”
The very first LOOK, His LOOK
captured me then and there, oh I remember the same LOOK He had for me the other
day when I denied Him thrice, While He was dragging Himself along with the
wooden rugged cross, He lifted His face and LOOKED at me that He knew that I
lied thrice telling others I did not know Him. The same LOOK, He had for me the
first time I met Him. How can I forget that LOOK?
The first WORD He spoke to me, can I
forget even that? Oh never, He said, “Come along, Follow Me, Are you going to
fish in the sea.. oh nay, come with me I will make how to fish men” He smiled , can I forget that smile, I just
left everything on my boat, and ran unto Him just like a little boy to his dad.
It was my house He ever visited, He
loved me in special way, when my brother
Andrew started to follow John the Baptist, I felt that this little fellow
brother of mine has had some pass-time , but one day he ran unto me shouting,
excitedly, “ I found the Messiah, come along, I will show Him” He literally dragged me to Jesus, the Nazarene,
I was shocked to Him, because I felt He knew me already, exactly he said the
same to me too. “Simon, son of John, I know you, hear after you will be called
as Capah, meaning a rock. How can I forget it? Yea it may because I looked like
very stable, steady , strong and shrewd,
I think He thought He could rely upon me …. Oh no, now I know what I
am, I am opposite of the rock, , I am
weak, unstable, unsteady, I was a COWARD,
spoke lies thrice fearing for my life, I said I did not know Him, lest
they would kill me too.
My life is finished. Abruptly
uselessly finished, -now nothing to do, all my Three and half years of work is
over, I am sacked.
How busy I was when Jesus was around,
making people to behave well, disciplined, after all wasn’t I called a
rock? So I took lead in every work- I
thought I should be the one on whom He wanted to lean upon, because I am BIG in
stature, strong muscled, active, undaunted.. But now what happened ? He died
horrible death, he is murdered, buried in the grave. Dust to Dust just like any
man.
I thought at least there He would be
in the grave, so that now and then I could go and sit in front of the sepulchre
and think of Him and weep out my pent up emotions. Now they are saying that His
body is not there. And that He is risen, Mary Magdalene says that she saw Him
and talked to Him, , “ I have seen the Lord, she said, and told us what He told her”----Whatever,
she is only a WOMAN, a “weaker vessel,” after all, she is too deep in sorrow, like all
of us, because she is woman she could not take the things as they are, why
should Jesus would talk to her, if at all He came to life, He would talk to one
of us the disciples, any way let that poor woman be consoled in her dream bs,
may her wishful thinking made her to be confused a bit. Leave her alone, the
poor soul. One day she will come around.
But what about that day when all of
us, hiding in a room fear for our life, cuddled to one another in a closed room
which was bolted tightly from inside?
He literally came into the room where
we were, thought the ng; only difference is I dared not to utter one word
aloud, enough was those lies I spoke about my Lord that I did not know Him, oh
yea, enough of that day, Didn’t I boasted closed doors, showed His wounded
BODY, and disappeared. We were
awestricken with deathly blow. But Thomas was not with us then, so he doubted
that all of us had a group hallucination.
So He bluntly rejected the resurrected Christ, of course I too had
doubts just like others about everything that was happening of my confidence I
told Him loudly, even every one deny Him I told Him; I would not …also I told
Him I was ready to die with Him, Didn’t I showed Him my valour by proclaiming the
battle by taking my sword and tried to kill that soldier in the garden? Only thing is I could cut his ear instead of his
head, though I aimed for it. Well, what
happened then, Jesus did not appreciated nor approved my valiant vigorous deed!
He refused to be protected by me, on the other hand he rebuked me saying those
who take the sword will be killed by sword, and purposefully insulted me in
front of everyone, Actually He was the one who told us to take sword with us
thereafter, I thought this was the time to which He wanted me to be courageous
enough to protect Him by fighting with those thugs, soldiers and that Judas the
traitor. I was even ready to give away my life in protecting Him. But He did
not approved my action, on the other hand He took that ear which was cut and
laid on the ground and put it on the soldier and healed him!!!! Hilarious!! It
was the peak of my humiliation.
He came many times to us after he left the tomb. Did many miracles and
showed signs to believe Him. But what is next. He left us at the lurch. Do not know how many days more He will be
visible like this. He is coming and telling us many things and going. All is in
utter confusion, nothing is there to plan.. We are sitting here and there and
waiting for Him to appear, He does not appear when we wanted to , but appears
when we least expected of Him.
Now why to waste our time like this? Whatever happened, has had
happened, Those were the glorious years, those 3 and half years, memorable
years.
But now what is there for me to do? Who will give us the “Words of Life”
I am left alone, I can not be as I was, All my confidence, the joy of living
and working for Him is lost, lost into the oblivion , I have nothing to do now,
I do not know whether they knew how I denied my Lord that I did not know Him
and how well I played the role of cowardice , but I know what I am now, the
most stupid , useless of all, the worst sinner of all, so now what to do? I
thought Jesus was telling me to be a leader for them, but now I know I do not
deserve to wash the feet of these people here, See how they cuddled to gather
in one bunch of fools, there the Scribe, Nicodumus also joined with us, Thomas
was the most miserable of all, those two twins John and James, and two more
sitting idly and looking into the sky.
I cannot be a leader, in the
sense He wanted me to, but I can be a
leader in the sea, let these poor souls have something to do, so I will cheer
up them, “ dear brethren, I am going into the sea to fish” I announced, to my
surprise they too wanted to join with me. All silence, no one opened the
mouth. Strange we worked all through the
night, but NOT ONE FISH, we caught
We proved ourselves that we are useless even
in this known profession…WHAT TO DO NOW??
Peter reminds my inner self, the unknown self, the coverage, of my self, the hidden self of mine, how many times I behaved as if everything is over, as if everything is finished, lamenting over the gone glorious years of serving Him, feeling empty not able to do any thing for Him as I used to do!! Walking with Him along with my husband , taking care of the church is different now to my present situation, I was the leader, a beacon to many to lead to guide, now I am just one among many , sitting silently in one corner of the many pews, life is questioning me What to do now? But I do not forget how Peter was refreshed again, His Holy Spirit enthralled him once again, he became a beacon of hope and servitude once again. The life of Peter is not finished here with this question, WHAT TO DO NOW? in fact that question lead him to reach the zenith of His glory.. !!Let us learn of him. Men loosing his praying partener spouse is nothing compared to a woman like me losing the prayer partner in life. This need to be coped up with all through the life, however I strive to be useful to Him. Especially festivals like this Easter, Christmas makes me to brood over the life, and its usefulness!!!!
Peter reminds my inner self, the unknown self, the coverage, of my self, the hidden self of mine, how many times I behaved as if everything is over, as if everything is finished, lamenting over the gone glorious years of serving Him, feeling empty not able to do any thing for Him as I used to do!! Walking with Him along with my husband , taking care of the church is different now to my present situation, I was the leader, a beacon to many to lead to guide, now I am just one among many , sitting silently in one corner of the many pews, life is questioning me What to do now? But I do not forget how Peter was refreshed again, His Holy Spirit enthralled him once again, he became a beacon of hope and servitude once again. The life of Peter is not finished here with this question, WHAT TO DO NOW? in fact that question lead him to reach the zenith of His glory.. !!Let us learn of him. Men loosing his praying partener spouse is nothing compared to a woman like me losing the prayer partner in life. This need to be coped up with all through the life, however I strive to be useful to Him. Especially festivals like this Easter, Christmas makes me to brood over the life, and its usefulness!!!!
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