2nd Day , March 13,    Great,  its simply superb, I was in the kitchen most of the time, today, I cooked  fish curry and tomato rasam yesterday night. and this morning  beans fry and ladys finger with a little fish, a soup like thing. for the lunch. and for the night dinner, palakk and potato,  beera kaya and chena curry and donda kaya fry. They liked the tastes. I am happy for that. Happy had long shopping hours today for the Birthday celebration of Jessica on 30th. Actually I donot want to miss it, that is the reason I made my way to Us by 26 of this month.  i started to translate the Pictorial Pilgrims progress but only three or four pages went on.  i tried to help Jessica to finish of the Home work .  Today I am sleepy for the night, it means i have over come the jet lag now.  I will write tomorrow again.

2013 Virginia visit

Well at last i reached virginia to the sweet home of Happy and James and Jessica and Jayden. . the 14000 kms of distance and 28 hours of continuous travel has had its impact on my body a little, i need to sleep a few hours in odd timings. This jet lag is so funny. when every one is active and working i feel so drowsy and sleepy cannot sit or stand or talk. I just lie down on my comfy soft bed and go into the other world, and when everybody is sleeping i wonderfully be awake and read and write and do my own things in smart way.  

yeserday i was telling about my travel from India to washington Dc  to jessica by showing the globe . she was so impressed and tried to grasp the whole concept of day and night in different parts of the world, and how God created the world dividing it into day and night. and she expressed her astonishment how I could make such long journey in matter of a few hours. That little face with intelligent eyes made me peaceful at heart. Peaceful?? yes its peaceful , there is no other word for me to describe it. I do not know the reason. but I felt at peace. 

 And this little fella, Jayden is all in all curious and so attentive to every word that i speak to him. when we are busy with our own work in the kitchen or some where, we see him politely bending or laying down on the mat where his favorite  rail track and rail engines are spread over . and  we see him continuously whispering some story to the train Thomas whole day. he never get tired of this and thus engage himself without bothering any one. 

Happy is as usual busy with her construction work. presently she is working on bunk bed for jayden and jessica. . She constructed fire place, big shelf for the great collection of books , shelves  and closets for children etc etc. I wonder how this little girl of mine is so constructive and productive all the time. I pray God that she must get an opportunity to work outside and show herself how intelligent in this competitive world  I am sure she would be the number One in any work given to her. 

   James is going to acupuncture  I accompanied him to the hospital just out of curiosity. I thought of observing that process, but he told me to sit in the lounge while he undergo the treatment  so I was there for an hour after which he just said "you should have been inside to see the process. "  may be a second thought he got while he was on the treatment. I said my be next time, and i am really interested to see the process. 

    On our way back home we had a very good Thai food, costing 1000 Indian rupees. in dollars $20/--actually this food costs only 200 rupees if we made it at home.  and if we go for it in India it  would be 300 rupees, not more than that. uhm the life style here in US is  JUST A STYLE,  

May be that is the reason, Happy never likes to go to hotels, like her father. I am really at loss whether to appreciate this whole concept of spending money in the hotels or cooking at home etc etc. May be other time i will ponder over it and put my thoughts on paper  in future.

Last night i had nice sleep, the outward temperature is too cold, I shivered like anything when i went out to the medical clinic with James yesterday afternoon. and even now i am fully covered with sweaters and thick blankets in my bed. 

I praise God for His benevolence and graceful love for me , by giving this cooler days  in that hot summer of India. I hope I would be spending my time here in productive way and useful way to the little family here.

 Yesterday we had nice fun doing the holiday home work of Jessica. She is so attentive and reciprocal in learning new things at a stretch. Hey I have great time with her learning some correct accent of certain English words, , she was correcting my accent  about the word" corrected. " and I tried to learn it from her but not up to the satisfaction of my little teacher. Of course i have to try again and again. I like her accent.  so sweet and so beautiful. Actually before i come here i was afraid that i may not understand her accent of Englsih language and she may not understand my English flow. but I need not fear of that. we both went on well. so far. 

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Hello, it’s the continuation of my previous

 “ a lil insider” in fact there are many more things I have not come out … ah, let me put down here, yes, infact the time is running off, and everyday some new work to be finished, unlike those past months, which I was doing at my own leisure, lazily and without any aim and destiny.  And now my little cuties in Virginia changed whole set of life for me even now. I wonder how it would be once I land there into the little wonderful embraces of those little arms, with shy and excitement. 

You know jayden and my self were so much attached with one wonderful song in my last visit.  Viz., Chirakaala snehithuda..   and early in the morning he used to come and used to ask me to play that song from my computer.  And he used to settle in my lap  with a swing in his body while the song and dance was playing on the screen.  So two days back when he was cooing so sweetly “ ammamma”  I asked him ‘do you remember  that song, chirakaala snehithuda.. ? and I hummed that song for him.   You know what he did??hahah you will laugh with me loudly.  Overwhelmed with the those forgotten memories, and could not continue  the phone conversation, suddenly he said “ I wont talk “ and kept the device into the hands of his mom, ( that is my daughter)  and he just closed his eyes with his both hands and sat in the chair without a word or sound.  Hahaha … that shows his beautiful  emotions of love for me.  His longing for my arrival, the words are few ( nil) when the heart is full. That little lubdub heart is with full of love and sweet memories for me.

What else I need more than this?  You know what I am doing presently.. I am typing all those beautiful games I played in my childhood.  Just for the sake of Jessica.  When I was with her last time we had had a wonderful time under the deck , her mom tied a swing for her. And she was there in it. And I was with a chair in front of her telling all those games , plays I used to play in my childhood. She being a lecturer, not a student, ( a trait she got from me..hahah) she was interrupting me in between the conversation.. and was telling me some games which were more or less like the ones I already told her with different twists and different setups.  When I expressed how wonderful are those games, she was so frank and truthful, she told me , “no ammamma, this game I just invented it for you  to listen, but I never played before.” Can I forget that sweet face , with such a wonderful wise eyes?? Nah , never,  I am just waiting eagerly to meet that little sweetheart No 1. (Jessica)  There fore I am noting down those games now.. Chemma chekka, oppulaguppa, gudi gudi guncham, veeri veeri gummadi pandu, kalla gajji  kanakanamma, dhaagud muthalu, thaatuku bommalu, isaka illlu, dhaadi, ashtachemma, viakhunta pali, golieelu, gachch kayalu, chintha pikkalu aata, idaka lo pulla aata. Kerchief aata, chevilo maata. Nemali pincham  in the book, etc etc… How I am waiting to tell her all those games and play with her.  You know she is learning piona, so she will be my teacher to give the first lessons of casio to me, which I have been thinking learning since my 13 years of age.  Oh you know how my daughter is waiting for me..there. she asked for little little things, to bring, not gold not clothes, not even eatable, she is just like her dad, ‘in this world , but not of the world” so simple and steady, so practical and so lovely.  And my sweet sweet son (in-law)  james,  he is there for me all the time,  waiting for me to see his mom in me. We used to have very many hours of quality time sharing and meditating the word of God.

I am waiting for a PLACE of beautiful surroundings, and  Pleasant Valley is a promise given to me in 2008   and to stay there for this summer would be a great opportunity to be alone, in His presence , in the presence of my dear children,  (Pleasant valley is the name of the place where my children live in Virginia, its near Chantilly. )  I have been thinking to use these beautiful surroundings in creating something fruitful. I want to translate the Pictorial Pilgrim Progress  into Telugu language for the sake of  young children. This would be my achievement , God willing.   These and many other, things await for me,  in coming days, I aspire for those green lawns where we three will play running after one another.   Poor little Jessica , she used to be very fond of those Rice Andhra cakes I used to made for her.  This time I want to make many more little little sweets for the children , quantity wise very less and make them taste the hand of ammamma. Atleast now there are two little birdies in the nest in Virginia  just waiting for me makes me thrilled, and enthusiastic,  and smily.  Waiting waiting and waiting for 25^th of March.. uhm.. God is my THODU( companion, any way  Immanuel,  is  with me. Isn’t it? Yes He is.

foolish prattle

hello, the time is running, meeting people , doing things, finishing important works etc.. etc... and I feel like leaving life here, and going some where , where I am unknown and without any identity. I will be none there. except the grandma of two little ones. hahaha... strange.. kada?  here i have my friends who likes to visit me and who likes to share their sorrows or joys and get a pat on thier shoulders.  thinking that i would never leave this country i started Casio and English etc... now i need to leave everything in between.    I wonder after all life is all ways like this. When God calls us, what all that we think very important is nothing, we get ready and leave everything on this magnet earth and fly into the blue horizon.   At least now, God willing , i have a hope that I will come back in September. But when it is with Heaven, never will I come back.. nothing will remember , as it is in the old age we are tend to forget everything, sometimes even our own children,  nothing would be interested, no tastes, no smells, nothing would attract us, no wonder once we die nothing would remain in mind. for whom we are craving for so much  here now..

Do you know two little ones in USA are like magnets to my life. for their sake i am leaving everything here and eager to meet them. wonder they will understand me, my language, my feelings, my love for them. wonder they like to stay with me.. do not know .. haha there would be cultural shock, they do not understand the accent, terms of English vocabulary  feelings etc. but still  a desire to meet them is so strong,  and I dare to take this venture, everyday I am getting dreams of fear, about my travel, funny, many times before i traveled  but now after i attained sixty years, i lost confidence in my feet, in my knees, wondering how the 24 and odd hours of journey would be to me this time.  I think we will feel the same when God calls us Home, in case He gives us time to ponder about the journey to Heaven. 

-- The journey would be unknown  only a slight feeling of it, as they do say, the death would be just like deep sleep. sleep we know and how nice it would be if death also would be like that, when we go to bed in the night, we do not know what is happening around us till we wake up in the morning, the all wise God has made us to taste death every day of our short life here on this earth.  The other day my friend Shanthi was saying something , which pricked my soul so much and I could not stop the flow of tears. She lost her husband at the age of 37, he could not give her children due to some health problem, she was left alone since then till now, she is 60 now, look beautiful and as if she is 45 or 50 years old.  all ways with a smile on her face. she had a stroke recently, but works so much in the kingdom of God she spends all her savings for it.when I casually asked her why you are spending so much on these events in the church, she said one sentence." I ask God to take my life without any trouble on this earth. I do not want to fall into the hands of people. Only wish is when i close my eyes i want to see Him.

she does not have any other desire in this life.. no one to care about her. uhmmm my life and hers coincides in many phases  she was born on august 16th me on august 28th . she lost her husband within a fraction of second just like mine. she does not have children, and my children are too far away to take care of me. she is also 60 like me, she drives her own car like me, and opens the doors of her garage and locks it all by herself just like me, there is none to wait for her at home and so on. we both love the Lord and we like to be in the presence of one another. our relatives and and others are just touch me not types .. and we have to take care of everything in life with a hope for next day.  Yes after all what we wish for , at the end of the life, a peaceful and quiet death. nothing else.. may be that is the reason why David so strongly prayed, teach me to count the days in my life, tell me how my end would be.  Life is just a drama , acting many roles on one stage. we meet important people and less important people, they vanish , they come and go, even our dear dad, dear husband, everyone with whom we thought to live with forever vanish. nothing is true on this planet. we just act act and giggle and shed tears. we do so many thing to be healthy, but health oh it is in the hands of God, all that we try is to avoid pain, nothing else.  health is not in our hands... only controlling pain may be , a little in our hands.  life shatters, life degrades, life vanishes, life is only a shadow. Hoping for everything would be good tomorrow. ..

a little innerside

hello, the time is running, meeting people , doing things, finishing important works etc.. etc... and I feel like leaving life here, and going some where , where I am unknown and without any identity. I will be none there. except the grandma of two little ones. hahaha... strange.. kada?  here i have my friends who likes to visit me and who likes to share their sorrows or joys and get a pat on thier shoulders.  thinking that i would never leave this country i started Casio and English etc... now i need to leave everything in between.    I wonder after all life is all ways like this. When God calls us, what all that we think very important is nothing, we get ready and leave everything on this magnet earth and fly into the blue horizon.   At least now, God willing , i have a hope that I will come back in September. But when it is with Heaven, never will I come back.. nothing will remember , as it is in the old age we are tend to forget everything, sometimes even our own children,  nothing would be interested, no tastes, no smells, nothing would attract us, no wonder once we die nothing would remain in mind. for whom we are craving for so much  here now..

Do you know two little ones in USA are like magnets to my life. for their sake i am leaving everything here and eager to meet them. wonder they will understand me, my language, my feelings, my love for them. wonder they like to stay with me.. do not know .. haha there would be cultural shock, they do not understand the accent, terms of English vocabulary  feelings etc. but still  a desire to meet them is so strong,  and I dare to take this venture, everyday I am getting dreams of fear, about my travel, funny, many times before i traveled  but now after i attained sixty years, i lost confidence in my feet, in my knees, wondering how the 24 and odd hours of journey would be to me this time.  I think we will feel the same when God calls us Home, in case He gives us time to ponder about the journey to Heaven. 

-- The journey would be unknown  only a slight feeling of it, as they do say, the death would be just like deep sleep. sleep we know and how nice it would be if death also would be like that, when we go to bed in the night, we do not know what is happening around us till we wake up in the morning, the all wise God has made us to taste death every day of our short life here on this earth.  The other day my friend Shanthi was saying something , which pricked my soul so much and I could not stop the flow of tears. She lost her husband at the age of 37, he could not give her children due to some health problem, she was left alone since then till now, she is 60 now, look beautiful and as if she is 45 or 50 years old.  all ways with a smile on her face. she had a stroke recently, but works so much in the kingdom of God she spends all her savings for it.when I casually asked her why you are spending so much on these events in the church, she said one sentence." I ask God to take my life without any trouble on this earth. I do not want to fall into the hands of people. Only wish is when i close my eyes i want to see Him.

she does not have any other desire in this life.. no one to care about her. uhmmm my life and hers coincides in many phases  she was born on august 16th me on august 28th . she lost her husband within a fraction of second just like mine. she does not have children, and my children are too far away to take care of me. she is also 60 like me, she drives her own car like me, and opens the doors of her garage and locks it all by herself just like me, there is none to wait for her at home and so on. we both love the Lord and we like to be in the presence of one another. our relatives and and others are just touch me not types .. and we have to take care of everything in life with a hope for next day.  Yes after all what we wish for , at the end of the life, a peaceful and quiet death. nothing else.. may be that is the reason why David so strongly prayed, teach me to count the days in my life, tell me how my end would be.  Life is just a drama , acting many roles on one stage. we meet important people and less important people, they vanish , they come and go, even our dear dad, dear husband, everyone with whom we thought to live with forever vanish. nothing is true on this planet. we just act act and giggle and shed tears. we do so many thing to be healthy, but health oh it is in the hands of God, all that we try is to avoid pain, nothing else.  health is not in our hands... only controlling pain may be , a little in our hands.  life shatters, life degrades, life vanishes, life is only a shadow. Hoping for everything would be good tomorrow. ...