From:
"JOHN MAX"
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To:
insidersband@yahoogroups.com
Day 18 Dammam: Sailing Tuticorn 05:8: 05
Dear Insiders, Greetings in His name! Grateful that I'm in your
prayers for sure. This is going to be my 2nd letter to you guys, and
my 3rd one going out of this ship after writing to my mom and
sis….hmm.
Joel, Jimmy, Joseph, and Jed…how are you? I miss you all—too much
but, life is taking its 'course' I suppose you know this song " the
tide is high, but I ` m moving on" Its same for me.
This letter I want to tell you something about this kinda
life and how I'm doing in it. But one thing is for sure I could not
suggest any of `our' types ones to get into this. At least for now
I feel that way. One of many reasons is No One knows what waits
when. And especially in times like that if God keeps SILENT ----
I've known it to be horrible. But, thank god He makes me feel alive
at least. I pray that such a phase as Job's (in Bible) never come
up in any of your (our) lives.
Matter of fact… Its all in our choice and the decision we
make. Its like , for now, I can make this letter to show how good
life here is – at the same time I can also burden you thinking that
I `m just struggling to survive and keep my vessel afloat.
By the way, Does Jesus want us to be emotional (sensitive)
by the way when He said" Learn from me for I am gentle and TENDER ?
I am learning my lessons ( spiritual ones) and now begging to think
that its damn easy to misunderstood what God says in His Word, and
imply it the wrong way. Only God can help us in that matter again.
Sometimes I just wonder " Am I thinking (philosophy) much? "
So far, the Bible, Our Daily Bread and What's so amazing
about Grace? –by Phillip Yancey has been of good help to me and this
book is almost about to end. They are something that keeps me feel
good when disturbed…hmm FULLSTOP
O.K here's it -----I got on board on 19th evening around
18:30 or so, along with 5 Syrian guys, some(2) who worked earlier in
the same ship some of them officers on engine side and with 4 other
Indians. 2 of them are A/B (able seamen) that comes under non-
officers (deck side) and 2 more cadets like me. One guy called
JITENDHER SINGH (A/B) is very crooked, he is 21 but just because he
is experienced (sailing) before, that too in the same company of
different ships, he thinks he is the owner and the best worst thing
about him is, he gains name and fame by suppressing others (like me,
who are new) before the officers and BOSUM (in charge of deck-non-
officers) So this guy gets on my nerve very often but so far by
God's grace I just avoided strife. I wish I could really love him
but, … hmm OK. I WILL!! He brings in regionalism and says I am no
Indian –( Pakisthani----LOL) Just because I do not speak Hindi and I
eat beef I speak English and for what not?…he just finds me
irritating –lol Sometimes when I am slogging in work, he passes by
whistling and singing ---Good Lord! Help me take things Positively.
Some times like that I also try to sing out or whistle at least from
my mouth, though for not sure from heart.
By the way, I am writing my dairy, and some times I get so
confused with dates and days cause, I work 4 or 6 hours (on and Off)
when ship is at anchor, and so. While writing the dairy I could not
make out the times before sleep and after sleep in a single day—
funny, two times I even forgot to brush my teeth LOLOLOLLL…
hhhhhhmmmm. Ok next two pages I will tell how I work the negative
and the positives here. Cause every time I start a Para, I soon end
up in philosophy. Lololol
The time when I got on board in Bombay our ship is
discharging sulphur ore in bulk (where frontfering takes place from
ships to Bonges=(open small ships for loading and supplying)
through GRABS cause over ship is not a long sides the Jetty. It was
in onchorage area. We got there by a launch (telugu) so, suplhur did
irritate my skin much and as fumes and dust burned my eyes, couldnot
sleep at nights. But the reasl task came in while cleaning the
Hatches ( cargo holds) ( we got 3 in our ship) It's a tough job.
Cleaning them with fire hose and draining out water into drums and
collecting the "garbage" (smuge—grime) which turns out into black
rotten color(like in our street drainages) and of course smells like
the septic tank with real white wriggle worm(born out of bacteria)
from the Bilge tanks (which are bit lower level than hatch floor)
These Bilge tanks really suck!! They have 2X1 foot manhole. Through
which I have to sneak in and clean the rot without a trace of water.
Its just `dirty' whole body stinks fingers and nails turn black,
skin is covered with oil and suphur –oh my I literally cried I felt
like prodigal son and that the times like.
Our car driver gets $100-/for just sitting behind the wheel – that
too without paying some 2 lac Rupees to some cheating agent like I
did.. lol Mommy—I want to come home- this what I thought I would
says all through my first week or 10 days till we reach Tuticorn Oh
during the first sailing from Mumbai – Tuticorn –5 days) I felt very
sea sick vomited often but again forced to eat made to drink sea
water for accustoming . laughed at . I really felt left alone I
understood no one really cares—really guys, love your `parents and
your loves ones' no matter how (they behave or react, cause no one
cares –no one pats your back or close ears while vomiting or at
least ask how you feel , let alone offering a tablet. So, reaching
Tuticorn I just poured out all my grief and pain first to my sister
cause I know she offers me good advice in sound mind with not much
emotional feelings like my mom. Then I wired mom and hung up both
times unable to control my crying lol lol . But their words that got
into me between my sniffs worked well somehow---mom advised me "
accept the situation" –sister emphasized that it was my choice. Mom
prayed, and so did I after hanging up the phone. God made me see
that the problem is—that I was asking God to bend his ways into mine
with no slightest idea that I am deviating but God kept strictly to
His track. So I felt lonely and unloved__ I cried not just because
of comparing my past life with the present, but because God kept
silent in all these tensions and decisions.
Then as ever, came the calm after the storm and God
said, `Its Me" (HIM) who brought you here – you did not come on your
own" so in a flick of moment all my resentment and regrets vanished,
Even if this is the worst company worst ship (where cadets slog like
A/B) though A/B get mere $250 than we for same work thought it
travels the worst routes (gulfs and India) The worst crew (Syrian-
who doesn't even know a bit of English or Hindi except Arabic) with
worst food(Syrian food which is Arabic bread bread and bread)
whatever –god in future and with faith (even now has given me what
He thinks is best for me. So lord, help me to be grateful to you.)
6/08/05
My address
JOHN (Deck Cadet)
M.V.Express Ship
Kassab Inter Shipping L.L.C
P.O Box 20355,
AJMAN
U.A.E
Hey but for every story there's a bright side too. In fact writing
about the goodness that I am going thru means that I am recollecting
(say, counting the blessings) god's goodness towards me and doing
that means praising Him.
The day I got here I am the first one to be allotted one
separate room with and attached bathroom with commode and geyser,
sink mirror and 6 tube lights centralized air conditioned with a
sponge bed, sofa, writing desk and a cupboard all rigidly fixed.
my room is on the main deck (star board side) with a little window
port hole) towards the astern every room has a life jacket according
to I MO rules. self igniting light, refrost reflective tapes and
belt. Food the first day breakfast for me seemed just delicious a
full fridge of cheese, butter, strawberry jam, and yellow ham
bottles Nobic bread olive fruits too many eggs Syrian seeds- which
exactly look like (Doves" s bit ) hahah green water seeds without
any specific taste ( just reminded me of king Hezekiah in bible
where pigeons shit was sold)And what not? Beef in different styles
pizzas with mushrooms capsicum beefsteaks daily one fruit apple /
banana weekly once Sprite cans. but you know you get bored of all
these within 3 days I now long just for plain rice or at least
rasam.
IMO International Maritime Organization
Sing Praises to the LORD!!
